Ghost Turd

-when you feel a shit come out of your ass but you don’t see it in the toilet. Bonus points if it’s a clean shit too.

1: *in my head to myself* “bruh I just took a whopping shit and it’s nowhere to be seen in this toilet..”

2: “you ever take a shit and it feels like you shat a bunch and when you look in the toilet, there’s nothing in there?”

“Yeah, I call those ghost turds”

by Smash_the_Pumpkins May 28, 2019

yah yah nah turd

A cool new phrase with the kids in New York.

ME: Hows it goin bro..

Him: Not bad bro..
ME: Yah yah nah turd

by GodzillaSiaa September 5, 2016

Late turd abortion

The act of aborting a bowel movement before full evacuation, sometimes mid-release, usually due to other obligations in one’s daily schedule. This often results in an uncomfortable turtlenecking of the rectum until defecation can be resumed.

I went to take a sh*t this morning but had to have a late turd abortion to make it to the meeting on time. Had to clench for 2 hours straight and it was unbearable. But at least my asshole will be stronger for the next one.

by OzzySnozzy October 11, 2021

turd molestor

Another derogatory term for a homosexual male.

Justin Beiber's a right fuckin turd molestor.

by jasetheheadcase1973 March 2, 2017

Turd maxxing

When thy self freezes thy turd and sticks it in his anal cavity.

Clax: brayden stop Turd maxxing.
Brayden: I CANT STOP.

by gangster definitons March 19, 2024

Turd Bird

Shitting a Bird out of your ass

"That is one big Turd Bird."

by Dr.FreezeLove March 21, 2017

Panning for turds

The perverse and possibly masochistic pleasure of seeking situations that are likely to cause oneself to be outraged or offended, in order to be being outraged or offended by them.

"I just posted this cry-laughing Charltie Brooker quote on Twitter, only to get jumped on by tweeps pointing out my technical inaccuracies."

Don't worry about it, they're just "Panning for turds".

by Lady Beefcake January 19, 2013