Miracle turd

A miracle turd is a turd which requires either minimal to no wiping

Joe-''you will never believed what happened man, this morning I dropped a miracle turd''
Bob-''No way, I thought that they were myths''

by Hola ese June 06, 2015

Panning for turds

The perverse and possibly masochistic pleasure of seeking situations that are likely to cause oneself to be outraged or offended, in order to be being outraged or offended by them.

"I just posted this cry-laughing Charltie Brooker quote on Twitter, only to get jumped on by tweeps pointing out my technical inaccuracies."

Don't worry about it, they're just "Panning for turds".

by Lady Beefcake January 19, 2013

Carpet Turd

Little pieces of dirt left in your carpet from animals. Usually know to happen if you have flees. Flee Dirt, Dust mites, Dirt, etc.

(Shane is laying on the floor)


Bob: Dude, I think i just got some fucking Carpet Turds in my ass crack!

Henry: Carpet Turds?

Bob: Yeah man, Carpet Turds!

by Wink666 March 20, 2009

you can polish a turd

believe in yourself and you can do it

timmy:look jimmy! a polished turd
jimmy:get that shit away from me
cause you can polish a turd if you try

by raybeez February 13, 2022

bat turds

Another term for some pot that comes in very small buds.

I called my friend and said "Hey, do you want to go half with me on a bag of bat turds ?"

by May R September 21, 2023

Turd sucker

An affectionate term for your dog who eats poo.

Hey turd sucker, you wanna go for a walk?

by Flyer bird June 14, 2023

Turd Kiss

The shit stain left at the top of the toilet seat from an improperly maintained ass crack.

Nate’s nasty ass left a turd kiss on the toilet seat again. Such a nasty bastard.

by formfeeder November 06, 2023