by James Restos October 22, 2008
Get the Jamma mug.The wives of the first 43 presidents were given the title of "First Lady", but that was the past. That's an OLD title from the OLD united states.
It's a new world and it is time for CHANGE. Therefore, its time for a NEW title for the president's wife.
Since America has a Capitalist economy and a president has become more of a figurehead than a leader, and being a good figurehead means being a consumer whore, the new title for the president's wife will be used for advertising space and product placement.
Every four years starting now, a corporation will pay the White House a MASSIVE amount of money to brand the president's wife with their product name, and the wife will be referred to as "First <whatever product bought their name>" as long as their husband stays the president. (For example: First Pepto Bismol, First Quaker Oatmeal, First Extra Strength Vagisil, First Murphy's Butt Lovin Lube, etc.)
This presidential term's wife name advertisement slot has already been purchased by Aunt Jemima.
So, that means Michelle Obama is the nation's first "First Aunt Jemima".
It is oddly coincidental that she strongly resembles Aunt Jemima. If you don't believe me, next time you are in the grocery store LOOK at a bottle of Aunt Jemima... They look so much alike they could be twins!
Also, she's a black chick, and everyone knows black chicks know how to cook.
Imma go have a pancake with a bottle of Michelle Obama now...
It's a new world and it is time for CHANGE. Therefore, its time for a NEW title for the president's wife.
Since America has a Capitalist economy and a president has become more of a figurehead than a leader, and being a good figurehead means being a consumer whore, the new title for the president's wife will be used for advertising space and product placement.
Every four years starting now, a corporation will pay the White House a MASSIVE amount of money to brand the president's wife with their product name, and the wife will be referred to as "First <whatever product bought their name>" as long as their husband stays the president. (For example: First Pepto Bismol, First Quaker Oatmeal, First Extra Strength Vagisil, First Murphy's Butt Lovin Lube, etc.)
This presidential term's wife name advertisement slot has already been purchased by Aunt Jemima.
So, that means Michelle Obama is the nation's first "First Aunt Jemima".
It is oddly coincidental that she strongly resembles Aunt Jemima. If you don't believe me, next time you are in the grocery store LOOK at a bottle of Aunt Jemima... They look so much alike they could be twins!
Also, she's a black chick, and everyone knows black chicks know how to cook.
Imma go have a pancake with a bottle of Michelle Obama now...
Person A: "Hey, you know that closeted muslim that isn't even half as black as Tiger Woods and is primarily middle-eastern and white? The guy people only say is black because black people want to feel included and have a reason to justify going on a power trip and pulling the slavery card again, and the white people feel obligated to go along with the black people because they're too afraid that if they formed their own opinions they'd be called racists? Umm... The guy with the big ears and questionable motives... The one who uses his ethnicity as a scapegoat, but still claims to be against people who are racially biased. I keep forgetting his name..."
Person B: "It's not ringing any bells..."
Person A: "Hmm... Oh yeah, his middle name is Hussein and he made it obvious that he intends to anally rape the country and spend a lot of money that's not his to spend. What's his name again?"
Person B: "Oooooh! You mean that douche bag, Barack Obama! What about him?"
Person A: "He's married to the First Aunt Jemima."
Person B: "Wow, she's waaaay too good for that nappy headed moron that got elected president."
Person A: "True dat! I hear the First Aunt Jemima makes a mean stack of pancakes too!"
Person B: "Hayull yeah! I'd tap that."
Person A: "Me too."
Person B: "..."
Person A: "..."
Person B: "I'm bored... Let's go throw vegetables at old people."
Person A: "Okay!"
Person B: "It's not ringing any bells..."
Person A: "Hmm... Oh yeah, his middle name is Hussein and he made it obvious that he intends to anally rape the country and spend a lot of money that's not his to spend. What's his name again?"
Person B: "Oooooh! You mean that douche bag, Barack Obama! What about him?"
Person A: "He's married to the First Aunt Jemima."
Person B: "Wow, she's waaaay too good for that nappy headed moron that got elected president."
Person A: "True dat! I hear the First Aunt Jemima makes a mean stack of pancakes too!"
Person B: "Hayull yeah! I'd tap that."
Person A: "Me too."
Person B: "..."
Person A: "..."
Person B: "I'm bored... Let's go throw vegetables at old people."
Person A: "Okay!"
by PsychoPencil January 24, 2009
Get the First Aunt Jemima mug.Related Words
Jamima
• jamimah
• Aunt Jamima
• aunt jamimas crack house
• CAN'T JAMIMA
• Jemima
• jamia
• jemimah
• jamiah
• jamilah
A very beautiful kind hearted girl she may seem rude the first time you see but when you get used to her it's the best feeling ever! She also likes to share the little she has😭
Dude 1: your talking to preeeshka
Dude 2: no man am talking to someone who is kind hearted and loving
Dude 1: ohhh you mean Jamilah
Dude 2: yesss man you get it🤙🏾
Dude 2: no man am talking to someone who is kind hearted and loving
Dude 1: ohhh you mean Jamilah
Dude 2: yesss man you get it🤙🏾
by we_pi November 22, 2021
Get the jamilah mug.This is a nick name for one of my ex boyfriends. HE SUCKS! I hate him and so does every gurl who meets him... But being JAMES ANDERSON he thinks that they like him! HE NEEDS TO GET A LIFE!
by Jai mard August 10, 2003
Get the Jaimard mug.A group of funked up gangstars that was formed by a ravaging alcoholic who walks around in his boxies, attempting to ravage other members of the group, the group consists of:
Beatmasta Fly
Funky Fresh Kid
The Probot
MC Jiggy Y
The Big Motherfunka
And is fully endorsed by Rapmasta Dan
Beatmasta Fly
Funky Fresh Kid
The Probot
MC Jiggy Y
The Big Motherfunka
And is fully endorsed by Rapmasta Dan
"Touch Me Again And I'll Funk You Up!"
"Nobody Dances, Like The Probot Dances..."
"Shut Your Funk Hole!"
"For Funk Sake!"
"Nobody Dances, Like The Probot Dances..."
"Shut Your Funk Hole!"
"For Funk Sake!"
by Funky Fresh Kid January 23, 2004
Get the Jammasta Generals mug.an AMAZING girl who has the most beautiful voice in the whole entire world! She also has the face to match as she is the definition of beauty! Every love song ever written is about her as she is the only thing that every man on earth thinks about. It is based on her that God designed the flower, the puppy and every cute thing. She often is seen either in the Bishops high school canteen or Mr bennets classroom during the day as its beauty would blind anyone who saw it. She is currently in a complicated relationship with Elis Shotton who she loves very very dearly.
oh my god you look so nice today!
thank you very much!
know who you remind me of?
who??
Jemima Martin!
oh my gosh thank you! thats the best compliment ever!!
thank you very much!
know who you remind me of?
who??
Jemima Martin!
oh my gosh thank you! thats the best compliment ever!!
by NotElisShotton December 27, 2011
Get the Jemima Martin mug.