two cracks in my ass

An expression used when something is hilarious. Also used in place of the expression "cracks me up."

Dude, that shit was so funny, it gave me two cracks in my ass.

by Sal The Man June 2, 2008

Get two beers and jump

When you are so fed up with your job that you need to make a grand "Fuck you all" exit, such as yelling over the intercom and jumping out the emergency slide of an airplane.

Flight attendant: "To the passenger who called me a motherfucker: Fuck you!" I'm going to get two beers and jump!

by dexi August 13, 2010

like two retards fucking

When two people totally and completely screw something up and make a total mess of things.

Bowser goes to open the door for Maggie. Maggie goes to open the door for Bowser. A second later Maggie gets slammed in the head by the door Bowser is already opening.

Man, you guys are like two retards fucking.

by Strangebeast January 16, 2009

Two way petting zoo

You pet the animals they pet you back

I wanted some intimacy so I went to a two way petting zoo

by bossatron2000153 bousley February 7, 2019

two girls one cup

the most disgusting shit ever
its a video showing a girl shitting in a cup and another bitch eats the shit up

its something that you know you shouldn't watch and yet you watch it anyway
and it will hunt u for ever!!

some guy watching two girls one cup:awwwwwwww fuckkkk wt the hell is thissss
same guy: why am i still watching this shit!!
can't believe i watched the whole thing

by lil-MoE January 29, 2009

the ole two finger jones

quite simply, fingering a bitch. A long practiced time honored tradition.

Jonny: "Hey Cody, why do you keep smelling your fingers?"

Cody: "Well, I just gave my ole lady Amber the ole two finger jones.

Jonny: Oh....can I smell?

by dabizz January 1, 2008

two for the pink one for the stink

see shocker

by Anonymous April 24, 2003