butt sucking turtle without a shell

A person who looks like a literal turtle without a shell and/or sucks. Used as a term for someone who is a butt sucking turtle without a shell.

"Yo, Mr. H sucks balls."

"For real. He's a real butt sucking turtle without a shell."

by no one freaking cares February 23, 2022

turtle underwear

To be wearing underwear that are very disgusting, often having a horrific odor and be very hard like a turtle's shell.

Adrian - Dude, Bonnaroo was really fun, but sleeping in your car wasn't. I'm wearing turtle underwear.

by SooooAnonymous May 1, 2014

Turtles and Conquistador

Regionally known in Northern Florida as a sexual tradition in which a blindfolded male suiter hangs a map of the trailer park low on a wall, chugs a 4 Loko, spins three times, and walks toward the map while neked. Where his erect member touches the map before he falls down, is where the object of his affection must hide.

Once hidden, the “turtle” must scream, “Ca caaaw!” At that point, the pursuer can remove his blindfold and roam the trailer park still neked, searching under each of his neighbor’s trailers.

The game ends once the “turtle” is located and humped or the local authorities stop the search.

“What’re ya in for?”
“Caught stealin’ a catalytic converter. You?”
“Turtles and Conquistador until the law showed up.”
“Well you ol’ salty horn dog! Been there, done that.”

by Honest2n March 23, 2024

Wash my turtle

Wash my turtle is used by someone ironically saying that he has a lot of important things to do.

I can't go out today.I have to wash my turtle.

by Fotindigo January 25, 2019

my turtles

Used as a pick-up line to refer to ones own pubic hair(s). pubs bush exotic turtle hairy

Would you like to go look at my turtles, they are pretty exotic.

by Smokey's pubs March 4, 2014

To Turtle

To wander aimlessly, hoping and praying to find a suitable commode to evacuation fecal material that has been inching its way out of the rectum slowly, like a turtle

I had to turtle myself 4 blocks towards the rock n Roll Hall of Fame praying they had a suitable commode.

by Mike.moffet November 12, 2018

turtling around

To move slowly or take forever to do something.

Omg, Abbie quit turtling around. Let's go!

by PandasBiscuit November 8, 2014