two spurt bert

a man that ejaculates prematurley

i was with this guy last night and he was a real two spurt bert.

by pinkprincess370 February 7, 2010

Bert

A term of endearment for a cat

I love sitting with berts. I love holding this bert

by ursubpar March 9, 2023

Bert Kreischer sit-ups

A highly competitive exercise competition requiring each participant to insert a well lubricated prosthetic penis and or phallic shaped object(s) into the anus prior to performing maximum effort sit-ups. The goal is to perform the maximum amount of repetitions each round prior to the prosthetic penis and or phallic shaped object(s) fully dislodging from the body. A winner will be determined following ten rounds of continuous play with no more than a one minute break in between rounds.

those last few rounds of Bert Kreischer sit-ups was a gut check!

by Mr SlapNTickle March 20, 2023

On Bert

Norbert that one dude who got unrightfully kicked from a skribbl.io lobby
Derived from "On God", the only exception being Norbert > God

Beta cuck: "Your girlfriend looks like my mom"
Chad: "On Bert"

by Chicken Lord May 26, 2020

bert

A disabled piece of shit, usually very rude. Always wears a hat and sits in his chair.

has a fine mom though

bert is a bad person
you see bert? he’s disabled.

by momsaremylife March 21, 2024

Ska-Bert

The act of stealing someone's handshake

Person 1: Hey nice to meet you *Attempts to give the person a handshake*
Person 2: Nice to meet you too *Goes to give him a handshake*
Person 3: SKA-BERT *Gives person 1 the handshake instead*

by Spazzzattack25 February 14, 2019

Bert's Law of Forgetful Transactions

The probability of a finance manager forgetting to collect the down payment that is directly proportional to the size of the down payment and inversely proportional to the memory capacity of the involved manager.

I saw the finance manager running after a customer realizing that Bert's Law of Forgetful Transactions had taken place.

by K9 _Cop May 22, 2024