alaskan toilet paper

Alaskan toilet paper is when you take a nasty ass shit and flatten it out with a rolling pin and freeze it and then use the frozen shit patty to wipe your ass after you take a shit

"fuck im out of toilet paper, looks like im going to have to make some alaskan toilet paper

by blakesmittty June 21, 2017

toilet paper

What your ancestors used in sacred rituals protecting different holes of the human body which is now extinct due to the SARS2.0 global outbreak.

Son, there once was a time when humans really got their heads up their asses, buying & stocking toilet paper as if it was the cure or as if a virus was about to attack their assholes and food & water were very low down the list of survival items.

by YuZzaFo0L March 24, 2020

Toilet Paper Ascot

Clamping toilet paper with your chin while beating off, making it accessible to clean up your huge load quickly.

A gentleman never forgets his toilet paper ascot when he comes……you spelled cum wrong.

by High Society October 28, 2012

Toilet paper

A currency that is used during coronavirus quarantine.

Family 1: Hey you got any hand sanitizer, we just ran out

Family 2: Yeah sure, 4 toilet paper rolls

by FartGarfunkel March 21, 2020

Vertical Toilet Paper

The act of putting a toilet paper roll vertical on the holder to show your gay lover he can sneak in when your wife is asleep tonight. This is an advanced move that needs at least a level 5 peeping Tom as the male mistress. Is common among boys/men names Chris that have long skinny dicks and gigantic mushroom tips. Beware.

Hey Tony look out for my “Vertical Toilet Paper” tonight ;).

Let Mo know he missed out on my “Vertical Toilet paper”

by Rufio171 February 22, 2018

toilet paper

one of the most expensive things you can buy during the CoronaVirus because everyone is buying it.
you simply cant find it anywhere

For some reason people think wiping their ass is more important than eating or drinking

damn it i cant wipe my ass because everyone in the whole wold has bought all the toilet paper!!!

by TheWhitestIndian April 13, 2020

Toilet Paper

See: The Sun

The Sun Newspaper is so bad that I wouldn't even use it as toilet paper.

by UltimateDoge June 5, 2022