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Goobs

Goobs (noun)

A preworkout gummy that turns “I’ll go tomorrow” into “more weight”

The snack sized dose of energy you take when you want to feel locked in without dry-scooping mystery powder like a medieval peasant.

A small chewy object with an unfair amount of gym motivation inside.
Popped some Goobs, now my skittles are organized by color
by JimmyLola February 4, 2026
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Goob

While little is data has been collected at this time philosophers describe (Goob) as a viscus build up of a mysterious solid mass. Located generally in the sub-cockle region of the lower antenna. When released if not properly dispossessed of, (Goob) in some cases has been known to cause malformations in neurotypical practices. (Goob) when left alone and a warm dank environment has been shown to not die off and rather continue cell division at rapid rates forming a fetal like abomination sent by god to punish us. (Goob) is best known to thrive in tube socks, cardboard boxes labeled Henny, waded up toilet paper and jars containing plastic figures of horses with horns.
Girl: did you just fucking Goob in me without even asking!

Henny: AHH fuck!,it was burning
by The goob man February 4, 2026
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