A notoriously gruesome sexual act, most commonly performed in the Pacific Northwest of the United States. This involves the male filling every possible oriphis of the woman, including the anus, oral cavity, vagina (or "beaver" if you prefer), and additionally the nasal cavaties and at least one earhole. Obviously, the penis and tongue are not enough to satisfy these requirements in most cases, so foreign objects are used as needed. These objects include, but are not limited to: pencils, pens, glue sticks, moose antlers, pine boughs, dildoes, hockey sticks, vegetables, and assorted trophies. The term "Canada's History" has several recognized origins. One theory is that when the entire population of extremely polite people of Earth migrated to Canada in the year 47 A.D., this was the predominant method of sexual intercourse. The more accepted theory, however, is related to the strange phenomenon associated with "Canada's History": both partners spontaneously begin singing the Canadian National Anthem upon reaching orgasm.
"Canada's History... it involves moose antlers, maple syrup, and the Stanley Cup." - Stephen Colbert
by Monte Valentine February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's History mug.Brought back into common usage after being referenced by Stephen Colbert on the Colbert Report on 2/4/2010, Canada's History refers to a sex act in which urine, feces, and maple syrup are mixed in the bowl of the Stanley Cup, before being poured into a vagina or anus which has been propped open with moose antlers.
"Man, I am having trouble sitting properly after my girlfriend showed me Canada's History last night."
by CBWolf February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's History mug.When two hermaphrodites drink a bottle of maple syrup and take turns jamming a moose antler in each others asses and shitting in each others mouths. After the shit and syrup has had time to mix in their stomach they gag each other with the moose antler and puke the shit syrup mush into the Stanely Cup.
by stevecolbert February 4, 2010
Get the Canada's History mug.Canada's History is what a women births out of her vagina into the stanley cup after at least six socialized doctors ejaculate inside of her consecutively while using an unnecessary amount of maple syrup as lube.
by culinarythug February 5, 2010
Get the Canada's History mug.Please do not mistake this with "Canada's Herstory"...
"Canada's History" is known as one of the highest rituals among men in that country.Atleast two men must be present for this classic competition. Directions: Make sure to lube that anus with some Maple syrup, you're going to need it. First one make male begins to perform oral sex on another. As soon as the second male is about to reach his climax, he will then turn to shoot it into the Stanley Cup. The Stanley cup is raised in the air, preferably on a coffee table. The height of which his jizz lands on the cup determines how far he must take a moose antler up the ass from the previous participant. It then repeats reversing roles. The person to get it in the cup first wins.
"Canada's History" is known as one of the highest rituals among men in that country.Atleast two men must be present for this classic competition. Directions: Make sure to lube that anus with some Maple syrup, you're going to need it. First one make male begins to perform oral sex on another. As soon as the second male is about to reach his climax, he will then turn to shoot it into the Stanley Cup. The Stanley cup is raised in the air, preferably on a coffee table. The height of which his jizz lands on the cup determines how far he must take a moose antler up the ass from the previous participant. It then repeats reversing roles. The person to get it in the cup first wins.
by Charlie Fellowship February 5, 2010
Get the Canada's History mug.Sex act involving wearing a moose head, drinking 100% Grade A maple syrup from the Stanley Cup, gargling "he shoots - GOAL!" and gargling the syrup down your bare chest while defecating on ebelskivvers being eaten by Rick Santorum.
by P.S.Udonym February 5, 2010
Get the Canada's History mug.A most deprived sexual act known to men and moose anywhere. Is a cleveland steamer variation, where at the beginning of sexual act, one partner (preferably a moose) takes a dump on the other.
After this, the shit is soaked in maple syrup and put outside/into the fridge. After several minutes of wild sex with the moose, you take the frozen dump out, and use it as an oral dildo, enjoying it's sweet taste while you gag on it.
Originally it used to be a threesome. Based on gender of the moose and other partners, they would enjoy either a double penetration, or one would use a Stanley Cup as an anal dildo.
Note! This cleveland steamer variation does not allow a steamroll combo! The shit will be too hard and will not smear as effectively + it's really hard to train a moose that way (although there were claims that this is possible with reindeer's) .
After this, the shit is soaked in maple syrup and put outside/into the fridge. After several minutes of wild sex with the moose, you take the frozen dump out, and use it as an oral dildo, enjoying it's sweet taste while you gag on it.
Originally it used to be a threesome. Based on gender of the moose and other partners, they would enjoy either a double penetration, or one would use a Stanley Cup as an anal dildo.
Note! This cleveland steamer variation does not allow a steamroll combo! The shit will be too hard and will not smear as effectively + it's really hard to train a moose that way (although there were claims that this is possible with reindeer's) .
<A> Man, you've heard about that sick fuck from Canada?
<B> Dunno, some say he's a coprophiliac, and some that zoophiliac. You know which?
<A> Dude! He's been through whole Canada's History!
<B> Oh man, and he startet off by liking the beaver more than usual.
<B> Dunno, some say he's a coprophiliac, and some that zoophiliac. You know which?
<A> Dude! He's been through whole Canada's History!
<B> Oh man, and he startet off by liking the beaver more than usual.
by cor-m March 3, 2010
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