Hairy Turtle

I hooked up with this guy who totally had a hairy turtle.
by Turtley December 27, 2021
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turtle wash

verb; to cause pain.
used when you are going to do something bad to someone; funny way to scare someone and have them have no idea what you even mean.. until now
"im gonna turtle wash your ass!"
by L Pea-lunk November 29, 2009
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Funny Turtle

When a man's penis goes from being erect to soft very quickly and continuously so it resembles a turtle sticking its head in and out of its shell continuously.
Girl 1: OMG Tina I put my finger in John's butt last night and he got a Funny Turtle!
Girl 2: He should just make up his mind as to whether or not he likes it.
by YAHDOEHADLWA January 07, 2016
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crack turtle

Someone who's extraordinarily slow, maybe due to an overconsumption of narcotics.
A: Man, I don't drink wine on Thursdays.
B: It's Friday, you crack turtle.
by thepranxter July 31, 2018
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crack turtle

A crack turtle is someone whose mental capabilities have gone slow due to the excessive use of substances.
Jerry: "Oh man, I just needed two hours to take my morning dump and brush my teeth."
Tom: "You're such a fucking crack turtle, Jerry. You should consider throwing the pipe away."
by thepranxter March 21, 2018
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sticky turtle

When you fuck you girl to the point of being limp. When you pull out your cock looks like a sticky turtle.
Me and ol lady had a wild night. I ended up with a sticky turtle
by Old dab rivers February 14, 2018
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Turtle-stabbin

A popular term for inserting a man's penis into an anal cavity. Most likely this is done in the doggy style position however can be done in many other preferred intercourse techniques.
"After the I left the bar last night, I went Turtle-stabbin with Stacy. Got into a bit of a sticky situation."
by Tiffini Smith February 08, 2018
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