alaskan crabwalk

The act of finding a solid floor(tile, cement, etc.) and proceeding to get into a crabwalk like stance and taking a shit on the floor and rubbing it around(in a circular motion like Spongebob bringing it around town) with your buttocks.

“Dude, did you see what Paul did at the party yesterday”.
“No, what’d he do”.

“This dude dropped his fucking pants and did The Alaskan Crabwalk”.

by definitely_not_nave May 26, 2018

Slappy Alaskan

A sexual act involving at least one person with a penis in which the performer engages the penis in an act of oral sex until the penis is sufficiently erect. At which point a full mug of freshly brewed hot chocolate is poured upon the erect penis after being promptly removed from the performer's mouth. This is then followed by excessive striking upon the erect penis in an aggressive slapping motion.

Guy 1: Hey bro, how'd your date go?
Guy 2: It was wild dude, we went back to her place and she gave me a slappy alaskan!
Guy 1: Awesome bro! How'd it feel?
Guy 2: Fucking terrible dude! I have third degree burns and bruises all over my dick and balls!
Guy 1: That's bogus dude, totally un-radical.

by Fapples December 6, 2022

Alaskan Blowdryer

When you shit on someones face and blow on it while eating cake.

Yo man my girl just gave me an Alaskan Blowdryer.

by FartFuckington December 18, 2018

alaskan jesus

Nailing someones balls or breasts to the ice and walk across their back

I gave that bitch an alaskan jesus

by Fuckboi98 May 29, 2016

Alaskan Tophat

A sex maneuver where multiple men cum on a girls hair - so much so that it looks like they have a snowy hat

Guy 1: Bro I just gave Sam an Alaskan Tophat with two friends haha
Guy 2: Dude what the fuck

by Lil` BananaDick September 9, 2018

Alaskan Baptism

When a girl squirts in your face when ur eating her out aka Alaskan baptism

“Yo this girl just gave me a Alaskan baptism”

by Weldzy cigs September 15, 2023

alaskan pizza

the act of orgasming on a partner's face who has bad acne in sub-freezing conditions such that the semen freezes instantly on the face, resembling the cheese and pepperoni on a pizza

"It was so cold last night, my boyfriend made me an alaskan pizza."

by NaCL Words September 15, 2021