crusty surprise

The crusty part of one's bedsheets soiled with cum from a nocturnal emission or self-handjob. Dogs prize crusty surprises as delicacies, much as we prize lemon merangue pie, and will seek them out in the morning whilst their owners are showering. Not to be confused with the crusty pillow surprise, although there's no reason why a pillow couldn't have a crusty surprise.
Woman: Richard, come here.
Man: What?
Woman: It's your dog. What's he doing?
Man: Barney! What you lickin there?
Barney: really guilty look
Man: Look's like Barney found himself a Crusty Surprise.
Woman: That's disgusting.
Man: That's all right, Mr. B! That cookie's yours!
by Richard J March 06, 2007
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crusty pickle

when a girls vaginal fluids are remaining on a mans penis after sex and eventually dries, leaving a crusty residue AKA crusty pickle

"That chick just gave me the nastiest crusty pickle ever!"
by cumtart69 January 20, 2009
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crusty semen

When you nut all over yourself and you let it dry there. After a while it becomes crusty.
I nutted on my hand before and let it dry for a hour or two, it turned into crusty semen.
by The Black Plague October 27, 2017
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crusty sandal

When you cum in somebody's butt, then shove your whole foot up inside to scoop it out.
Bro Jenny totally let me do a crusty sandal on her last night, it was great
by nicecranch January 20, 2020
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Crusty Napkin

When you eat multiple foods with a high content of fructose corn syrup, and you wipe your sticky-icky mouth on an innocent napkin.
Cory, can you pass me then...oh never mind, you have a crusty napkin.
by ShooLazers October 08, 2011
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bumping crustys

I busted my grandparents bumping crustys
by willevans1972 April 01, 2011
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Crusty macaroon

When’s females lips hang over thong underwear. When the thong is too small for the big clam make it look like a macaroon
My thong panties were really bothering me and as I looked down , my vagina looked like a pink crusty macaroon.
by Backdoor bacon February 03, 2018
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