penis crumpet

Penis Crumpet:
When one ejaculates from their erect penis so hard, it shrivels and flattens. This will only occur when overstimulation takes place, after many orgasms.
I came so hard, now I have a penis crumpet
“Maybe you should go to a doctor, Jim.”
by Dr. Digbick September 29, 2018
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Crumpet snatcher

An extremely offensive British offensive, meaning to steal ones freshly buttered crumpets
"Did you steal my tea?" You're such a crumpet snatcher!"
by Yllom.gollom February 04, 2016
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Crumpet snatcher

An extremely offensive British offensive, meaning to steal ones freshly buttered crumpets
"Did you steal my tea?" You're such a crumpet snatcher!"
by Yllom.gollom February 04, 2016
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Protest Crumpet

Typically a late night snack undertaken just because you can and to no one is around to stop you. Alternatively it may refer to your partner refusing a Buttered Crumpet.
Just got warm in bed when I needed to wee so went to make a hot water bottle because I was freezing and now made Protest Crumpets because I needed them for the affront of standing in the cold kitchen.
by Myersrum February 15, 2022
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Buttering the Crumpets

When you cum while pooping at the same time and the cum is spread on the poop before it hits the water. The penis may also be used as a buttering knife.
Yo' Derek what are you going to do later?
Probably just go home, drink a few beers, and try to butter the crumpets again.
What? Yo, buttering the crumpets is easier when you don't drink.
by poopbutter July 12, 2013
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crumpet dodger

A man who avoids women; typically because he is a homosexual.
"Hey Jamie, you massive crumpet dodger"
by Joni-K July 06, 2016
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Crumpets and tea

Crumpets and tea is a British food, usually eaten for breakfast or afternoon paired with tea often. It is made from flour, milk or water and yeast.
Friend 1: Hey bruv you wanna come over and have some crumpets and tea mate?

Friend 2: what kind of bloody question is that? Of course I do!
by sex minister April 27, 2022
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