insta hoe

literally anyone who has 300+ followers on Instagram

Person 1: damn look at his account, he has 332 followers!
Person 2: damn he an insta hoe frfr

by frogscotch November 26, 2021

Insta-mum

A lovely looking lass, easy on the eye as they say and takes to Instagram to show off her tings with provocatively shot pics and creative use of camera angles, despite the fact that her parents also have social media accounts and might see this shit. Then the fucking slag has a kid. Unable to keep her legs shut long enough to keep out the majority of Insta-dicks, she is seeded and Insta-fuckboy as expected, fucks off. Kid barely starts to just be able to walk and say "Mum" when it's given it's own social media accounts and it's not before time that the kid having gotten a bit older now has access to pictures of his own mum being a tart. As do his friends. You guess the rest. Drugs, many other Insta-siblings from many other Insta-dads, bullying, depression and eventually suicide. Fuuuuuck.

"Yeah boi! Saw your mum on-"
"Fuck off! I know she can't keep her clothes on!"
Why does my mum have to be a Insta-mum? Thought Karl whilst crying/over-eating/masturbating/self mutilating later that day.

"Insta-mum! Insta-mum! Does she take it in the bum?"

"Hey Karl?"
"What?"
"Can I have a go on your Insta-mum?"
"............."

by incumbent sausage July 16, 2018

Cadillac insta model

Most Instagram models are Cadillac insta models. They're super rich, they trick followers into believing their lies, deceit the Chevrolet insta models, and all they do for the money is use editing apps and show off their butts & boobs.

Named after the Cadillac, an expensive car.

All Cadillac insta models are what old virgin men are obsessed with.

Nastassia Ponomarenko is one example of a Cadillac insta model.

by Urban Husband January 12, 2019

Insta-Smut

when a fictional couple sleeps together too soon in a story.

The chemistry between Morana and Tristian was lacking because of the ‘Insta-Smut’ in "The Predator" by RuNyx

by Bora Blooded Woman May 9, 2023

Stallone Insta

The act of dying while imitating something from a Stallone movie while posing for Instagram.

Damn did you hear Greg died having sex with Sandy B on Instagram? It was a real Stallone Insta

by Pauliewise November 21, 2021

Insta-boner

When you get turned on so fast that your dick gets hard quicker than it can rearrange itself in your pants. Usually requires manual adjustment and is accompanied by drool and the inability to make rational decisions as lack of blood leaves your brain in a stupor.

Friend: “yo! Dude! Fix yourself! You got an insta-boner.”
Me: *babbles incoherently*
Friend: “Emily walked by, didn’t she?”
Me: “random jibberish* *fixes junk*

by Fetch Stick August 25, 2018

insta punishment

A consequence of a bad choice Instagram post that was seen by a parent or authoritative figure in a young person's life.

"Excuse me, did you post a video of yourself breaking your brother's lava lamp? Well that's a Insta Punishment, young lady!"

by Reali_D June 28, 2020