Vomit Bidet

When one person squats over another who is laying on their back and farts into their mouth until the person laying on their back projectile vomits into the squatting persons asshole

I ate so much broccoli today i cant wait for you to give me a vomit bidet from my farts.

by skoolbuss February 03, 2024

Bidet

Giving yourself a bidet

When you poop and the toilet water splashes up at your butthole

Guy 1: I just gave myself a bidet!
Guy 2: you must’ve had a huge poop!

by boboobobobob December 06, 2019

Redneck bidet

Carefully pinching your anus as a log is dropping to create a splash, creating enough of a splash to clean your asshole

Went drinking last night and I’m stuck at work w/ swamp ass
on a 12 hour shift w/ no baby wipes , just had to do a redneck bidet

by Falkowitz December 08, 2020

Trail Bidet

When you shit on the trail and your buddy squirts beer up your ass to clean in up.

I had no toilet paper on the trail and had to dump so buddy gave me a trail bidet.

by skidooboyspoopin December 17, 2024

Bidet tears

Bidet tears: when someone's tears are so pathetic you want to wipe your ass with them.

I wish my ex would stop trying to guilt me into a mercy fuck with his bidet tears.

by anonymous January 23, 2022

American Bidet

The act of shitting in your side-loading washing machine, then using it to clean yourself.

Theres a line for the bathroom, I guess it's time for an American bidet.

by Mjku December 22, 2014

newton's bidet

when you are taking a shit and the splash caused by the turd cleans your anus.

newton's bidet is when your shit has splashed toilet water on your ass. oh man, newton's bidet came in clutch with the clean up.

by Seth mithch's friend February 22, 2018