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rank wank

wanking to material you would usually find to be 'rank', or disgusting, but still managing to finish
Friend 1: I watched a porno last night where a pregnant chick was getting fucked anally against a brick wall, and then she went into labour.
Friend 2: Wow, that sounds disgusting.
Friend 1: Yeah, it was a pretty rank wank.
by kingbiscuit December 25, 2012
mugGet the rank wankmug.

Wank Ballad

A song which a man/woman choose's to ride to O-train too in an orgy for one.
"Dude what's your wank ballad?"

"Bro, for me its got to be Jitterbug by Wham! Just gets me there."
by HammerSmashElmo September 4, 2018
mugGet the Wank Balladmug.

Birthday Wank

An Evening of Masturbation on one's birthday to celebrate the conceivement of one's self.
Mate: yo man you wanna go out tonight for your birthday?

You: sorry man I'm having a birthday wank tonight
by 69420candice69420 February 22, 2023
mugGet the Birthday Wankmug.

Wank muppet

The sock you use to cover your cock which catches your cum when masturbating.
He is such a wank muppet!
by Christophlambpie August 15, 2023
mugGet the Wank muppetmug.

Deliveroo and wank

The apotheosis of living for the modern middle aged family man. Netflix and chill, for husbands who have long ago abandoned both erotic frisson and euphemism.
"The wife's away, so I'm going to treat myself to a Deliveroo and wank."

"You mean..."

"Yes, a lukewarm curry followed by furious self abuse."
by bighairyotter August 10, 2021
mugGet the Deliveroo and wankmug.

Angry Wank

Creating your self a brand new fore skin (especially if challenged to a Surprise Space Docking challenge) by wanking really, really fast and hard..... warming up the skin and extending it way beyond the tip hopefull so far it can be placed as a cover over the tip of your opponents penis.
This one time on the Hay Plain I took an angry wank whilst staring at a cupboard. Through the window a horse was looking me right in the eye. He knew.
by Lorraine Haul May 23, 2023
mugGet the Angry Wankmug.

fat wank

the urge to release thy juice from the beast
john: how was your day
me: not good i need a fat wank
by hbdsuhfbu May 6, 2021
mugGet the fat wankmug.

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