punch the turtle

To attempt something that does have a small chance of success - but will likely end in failure and pain.
Did you hear how Josh and Christel are trying to create new slang? They're trying to punch the turtle with that...
by JBonesMcGee March 30, 2019
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thirsty turtle

(n.) term used to describe chinless, humanoid species found in Northern Louisiana. usually female, these creatures resemble a turtle who lost her shell. Despite her FAS features, she will be full of an ignorant, white trash pride and sense of superiority, which will make her feel entitled and desires among a group of male peers who would stick in a dead dog so long as it was still warm.
I can't believe Maria Elena Cimino is working here again but she is a thirsty turtle for those auto-sales managers.
by firecracker4u March 13, 2017
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turtle eggs

when 10 guys each put their nutsacks in one man's butthole and ejaculate at the same time
hesus: dammn those turtle eggs last night are what keep me from committing suicide.
by the titty ytickler February 22, 2021
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Franklin the turtle

An older, hairless flamboyant gay bald man. Their wrinkly neck folds and open mouth define the turtle-esque appearance.
As he aged, Chuck began to resemble a flamboyant hairless turtle in appearance, which prompted the gays to call him Franklin the Turtle.
by Tofu Queen March 20, 2024
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turtle up

When a pregnant woman falls on her and can not get up.
Dude, did you see that pregnant lady fall? she went turtle up!!!
by bbyeater October 12, 2017
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nair turtle

After prarie dogging before you take a massive shit, the turd finally slides out of your rectum hole silky smooth.
Man after eating taco bell, i let me out a nair turtle.
by Peter Parker November 17, 2016
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Turtle Slides

When somebody takes a shit in a toilet and after they flush, streaks are left down the inside of the bowl that look similar to the streaks left in mud next to a pond that turtles slide into.
"Dude, what the hell did you eat? A whole pound of cheese?"
"What? Why?"
"You left some wicked bad turtle slides in the toilet."
by TechnoShamanInflux June 18, 2018
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