An Afghani Handy is when a women, preferably of Middle Eastern descent, wipes her ass with one hand after taking a shit. Once she does this she proceeds to give you, or the male a hand job with the same hand.
by bssknox December 10, 2009
Get the Afghani Handy mug.by havwingswillfly July 12, 2010
Get the handi-capped mug.When you place your hand over your anus for the whole duration of a fart. Then once complete you smell your hand or place it in ones face
by Hamish5487 December 12, 2007
Get the Handy Fart mug.Brian received a handy-down from his older brother.
by canonpic May 6, 2009
Get the handy-down mug.1. The popular 1940's Educational Film Production Company, 'Jam Handy', who created such classic films as "A Case of Spring Fever"
2. The even more popular sexual favour, provided by certain prostitutes, whereby the hand job is enhanced by liberal application of various jams, jellies and preserves. At the lower end of the menu is the 'Hartley's Strawberry Jam Handy', which will cost on average £2.50 due to the low fruit content, all the way up to Fortnam and Mason's High Grove Organic Damson Preserve , which will cost a discerning customer at least £10 a Handy. Seville Orange Marmalade Handy's are seasonal.
Most Jam Handys are executed with seedless jam, but there are some fringe extremists that prefer seeded raspeberry Jam Handys, known in the trade as "Dick Raspers".
2. The even more popular sexual favour, provided by certain prostitutes, whereby the hand job is enhanced by liberal application of various jams, jellies and preserves. At the lower end of the menu is the 'Hartley's Strawberry Jam Handy', which will cost on average £2.50 due to the low fruit content, all the way up to Fortnam and Mason's High Grove Organic Damson Preserve , which will cost a discerning customer at least £10 a Handy. Seville Orange Marmalade Handy's are seasonal.
Most Jam Handys are executed with seedless jam, but there are some fringe extremists that prefer seeded raspeberry Jam Handys, known in the trade as "Dick Raspers".
"Nigel, where does one acquire a Jam Handy in this borough?"
"Why Nigel, I believe one can have a quality Jam Handy down behind the Tesco's if you're in the mood for some Hartley's seedless Raspberry, 35 percent fruit, only £2.50. Bargain."
"Why thank you Nigel, you're a real chap."
"Unless you're one of those filthy Dick Raspers, in which case I'll have to call the local constabulary."
"Oh Nigel, how could you."
"And I always took you for a marmalade man. And I let you watch my children."
"Why Nigel, I believe one can have a quality Jam Handy down behind the Tesco's if you're in the mood for some Hartley's seedless Raspberry, 35 percent fruit, only £2.50. Bargain."
"Why thank you Nigel, you're a real chap."
"Unless you're one of those filthy Dick Raspers, in which case I'll have to call the local constabulary."
"Oh Nigel, how could you."
"And I always took you for a marmalade man. And I let you watch my children."
by Adrian Potato September 26, 2020
Get the jam handy mug.Linda Rucker denied the accusation that she had offered Christopher Waterhouse an SPF handy at summer camp.
by eunuchorns and reignboughs August 11, 2014
Get the SPF Handy mug.When a menstruating woman pleasures herself and her dude walks in a catches her and he’s disgusted so to try and make it better she give him a hand job with her bloody hand.
Guy 1: Why is your dick red, I can’t put that in my mouth?
Guy 2: Oh, craziest thing, I caught your sister masturbating and to keep me from running and telling everyone, she gave me a Red Handy.
Guy 1: GROSS DUDE SHE’S ON HER PERIOD!
Guy 2: Haha, exactly.
Guy 2: Oh, craziest thing, I caught your sister masturbating and to keep me from running and telling everyone, she gave me a Red Handy.
Guy 1: GROSS DUDE SHE’S ON HER PERIOD!
Guy 2: Haha, exactly.
by Captain Red Wing June 6, 2018
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