Bidet

The act of spitting a fluid into your partner's asshole.

"Do you want to try out these new waterproof sheets?" "Sure, only if we play bidet tonight." "What's bidet?" "My face is the bidet and this drink is the fluid" (holds up 44oz Mt. Dew from 7-11)

by J's A's August 1, 2019

Bidet shit

A poop or shit that splashes toilet bowl water onto your bootie hole crack area therefore washing off the poop.

I went to take a shit, but there was no poop in the toilet paper, the bidet shit washed me out very well.

by Moose45 March 28, 2019

Bidet

Giving yourself a bidet

When you poop and the toilet water splashes up at your butthole

Guy 1: I just gave myself a bidet!
Guy 2: you must’ve had a huge poop!

by boboobobobob December 6, 2019

Canine bidet

When you smear peanut butter on your chocolate starfish after pinching a loaf to entice a dog to lick it off, thus cleaning your ass.

I usually prefer the canine bidet to a regular one, but I ran out of skippy.

by Milkbones August 22, 2019

Finnish bidet

A term coined by professional shit poster (and Youtuber) Jeff Holiday, a Finnish bidet is taking a shit in the middle of a blizzard, and letting your body heat melt the frost on your ass in order to wash yo ass (Tariq Nasheed style)

Bertha didn't wipe her ass after taking a shit in the her outhouse in the middle of a blizzard, she just Finnish Bidet'd it

by Wizard of Cummies December 20, 2017

Bidet-ing

The act of using your mouth as a fountain to clean someone’s asshole

Hey babe, we’re out of toilet paper and I could really use a good bidet-ing right now

by Jack Smashers April 26, 2020

bachelor bidet

When someone uses a shower as a bidet when there is no toilet paper available or someone is too lazy to buy toilet paper.

I ran out of toilet paper, so I jumped in the bachelor bidet to clean myself.

by Micro Mage March 13, 2020