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Moneyfucker Jesus

Not the real Jesus. The Jesus that some bible thumpers believe in who believe that if you don't "tithe" that is don't give ten percent of the money you make to there church God and/or Jesus is against you and will do nothing for you.
Man:I must be dead1 Is that you Jesus?
Jesus:Yeah,the ten dollars you owe me?
Man:I ain't got ten dollars.
Jesus:Then your going to hell till I get my ten dollars.
Man:I'm dead I can't get ten dollars.
Jesus:Too bad. Next.
And that's an example of moneyfucker Jesus.
by Deep blue 2012 February 20, 2010
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Jesus chord

What's the fingering for the Jesus chord on this guitar?
by pentozali August 18, 2010
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demon jesus

the shadow you see behind a statue of jesus on a big pink church at night in down town flagstaff arizona
"see that shadow"
"dude it looks like a demon jesus"
by j.a.cob October 22, 2006
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Jesus balls

Two spheres with a close gap between them, mounted at the base of the tower of a broadcast AM transmitter.

One ball is connected to the tower, the other one to earth ground.
In case of lighting, an electrical arc forms across the gap, routing the lightning to earth and saving the transmitter equipment.
Called "Jesus Balls" because if you touch them "you see Jesus" (i.e.: you can die).
If you don't want to see Jesus today, stay away from the "Jesus balls" over there.
by DavideAndrea August 1, 2013
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Chocolate Jesus

Other than the name of the Tom Waits song a chocolate Jesus is the sexual act of shitting in someones mouth and they die of e. coli poisoning and you hope they come back three days later.
I tried the Chocolate Jesus on Carol the other day and I went to the tomb and the stone was still there. I guess she isn't a Choclate Jesus.
by Captain Donald November 1, 2010
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Emo Jesus

A god among us he controls your sorrows and hell. He lives in California looks stoned all the time and plays zelda.
Emo Jesus interfered and our relationship is over, now I feel like becoming emo!
by Nott Nott October 10, 2008
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Jesus High

The act of being so high off of marijuana that you actually believe you can walk on water and shit like that.
Guy 1: duuuuuude...
Guy 2: Shit man, you are JESUS high!
by James Michaels November 15, 2009
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