self-serving friend

An individual who is only your friend to use you for their own personal gain and is magically not around when you actually need a friend. Also known as selfish and a bitch.
Wow, you know Jessica, we should have seen right through Rebecca, she is such a self-serving friend; she only wanted to be friends with us so she could pass bio lab.
by Good Friends United January 15, 2009
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Self Serve Blumpkin

Similar to a Blumpkin except there is no second party involved. The self serve consists of jerking off while taking a dump. The self serve happens much more regularly because you do not have convince a slore to blow you when taking a crap.
Mike muth was on the prowl for a blumpkin but wasn't coming up with a suitable candidate, therefore he had to resort to the classic self serve blumpkin.
by Baller26 May 18, 2008
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crew served handgun

This is a satirical remark regarding oversized, impractical pistols.
Gawwwd, that .50 is a crew served handgun!
by I, Wreckerrr March 31, 2021
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soft serve

term used in folkstyle (high school, not WWE shit)wrestling to describe someone who lacks mental toughness
That kids a scrub! He's soft serve.
by snorgle December 07, 2003
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soft serve turd

That smooth and continuous, super creamy turd that resembles soft serve ice cream.
I’m just gonna openly brag about this astounding evenly colored and perfectly formed soft serve turd!
by Dr Bunnygirl September 27, 2019
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single serving friend

A person you hold a conversation with while waiting in a public place, odds are you will never see this person again. You can make single serving friends while in line, on public transportation, at the movies, at amusement parks etc...
Don't let Kendra talk to strangers at Walmart, she attracts the weirdest single serving friends.

While at the movies, I made the coolest single serving friend, he was an author and could ride a unicycle.
by Ayelura October 20, 2011
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Sandusky Soft-Serve

Much like the Cleveland Steamer, this act involves depositing fecal matter on another human being. The direct act of San Dusky Soft Serve is as follows: You want to break up with somebody, you wait till they're asleep. Then, you open their mouth and take a nice ice cream soft serve type shit right in it. Punch them in the head to wake them up then flee the scene.
Jimmy hated Miss.Bojingles, so he decided to leave her with a Sandusky Soft-Serve as a parting gift.
by Willsyss October 07, 2006
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