schlongness monster

A penis so large, that it is often thought of as a myth. While it exists, few have seen the schlongness monster released.

Sara said that when mike pulled out his penis it was so big, that she thought it was the lochness monster. He shouted, its the schlongness monster, then knocked her in the face with it.

by mexicanmike03 December 10, 2013

schlong gobbled

Eager to provide oral service to a cock(s).

Not stopping until all parties involved are satisfied

I sure schlong gobbled that redneck cowboy last night.

by Throbbin_Rob November 9, 2019

Sausage schlong

The act of taking a condom, pooping inside of it and tying it shut, and then using it for insertive pleasure. Can also be frozen for a harder feel

Melissa told me that she used a sausage schlong last night since her boyfriend is out of town.

by EdgyMeemStar January 22, 2018

Schlong Shot

Like a dick pic only schlonger.

I always have mixed feelings about unsolicested schlong shots. On the one hand, Ew, on the other hand... dayum!

Nick asked me to send nudes last night, but I made him send me a schlong shot first!

by Kinn Notap May 21, 2017

schlong nugget

When a penis is dipped into different variety of sauces and licked off while your in a car.

Crystal: last night I gave mike the best feeling in the world "schlong nugget" with some hot sauce.

Chelsea: ewwww girl try it with ranch!

by JENNASABADBITCH August 23, 2011

Massive Schlong

a MASSIVE wang

"Derek has a massive schlong" said Brenda

by LORD Schlong February 16, 2018

schlong-slap

To be slapped with one's schlong.

1) I was fed up with her, so I decided to whip it out and give her a much needed schlong-slapping.
2) I really got schlong-slapped with work today at the office.
3) Whoever was working on this before me really deserves a Grade-A schlong-slap to the dome.
4) I decided to work out this afternoon and perfect my schlong-slap technique.

by bluzebrother April 7, 2010