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Chav

Complete wankshafts who think there hard and hunt in packs on emos when there on there own they shud all just drop dead!!! they also listen 2 wank music
chav1:luk lid an emo
chav2,3,4,5&6:lets get him
by emo666 July 3, 2009
mugGet the Chavmug.

chav

The chav is normally a class of people below working class, i.e classless if you like. They have no money of their own as they get all of this from the government.. how nice of them. Getting payed to do nothing, and incentive to have many many offspring - as they get even more money for this. And, free housing.
The chav father is typically 12 - 17 years of age , towards their early 20's they will have roughly 10 chilren of whom all have different mothers.

The same applies to the chav mother except she will have 10 children of different fathers! this is how they are planning to take over the world - OVERBREEDING.

All chavs have to wear "uniform" if they want to be a part of the gang, if they do not conform to this "cult like" demands of the leaders they will be extradited until they learn to do as all others do. Typically, they all wear imitation sports clothes, a favourite look is to tuck ones socks into ones trousers, possibly to intimidate passers by.

One of the favourite habits of the chav is to hang around shopping centres near argos and "maccy'dees" as they like to call it. They feel that they are very scary, often calling out swear words and insults that would not impress three yr olds. "oi spekkie" , "haha t**t you've got a tie on" . yet when confronted they usually run away, if not they just cowar!

lastly they have built their own language from base english, most words are less than 2 sylables long so as not to confuse each other. not that they would know what longer words meant anyway as most drop out of school at 11.
by sunshine1984 July 20, 2008
mugGet the chavmug.

Chav

Being ugly but yet tring to appear uglier by wearing hideous tracksuits and usually over-blinged. Easily found, just look for council houses and herds of kids.
Wow! Check out that beasty looking woman. Thats gotta be a chav!!
by LauraaaWood December 21, 2008
mugGet the Chavmug.

chav

Council
House
Adolesent
Vermin

...nuff said
"run its a chav along with his homies"
by ejdowski face September 15, 2008
mugGet the chavmug.

Chav

Chav- subspecies of human. noted for the choice of shell-suit body armour, their chariot, usually a Nova, choice in shit beer, tucking leg garments (refered to as "trakkies") into the socks, the body language and accent.
WARNING! A CHAV IS NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH A ZOMBIE WHICH THEY BEAR RESEMBELANCE TO IN MANY TERMS. USE THIS TO YOUR ADVANTAGE ON THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE, BY GOING TO A CHAV INFESTED AREA. THE ZOMBIES WILL IGNORE SAID AREA, THINKING THE DISEASE HAS ALREADY SPREAD TO THAT AREA
Essex is the sfest place to be in a zombie outbreak, just try to blend in with the chavs and you should live for at least a day*


*being in essex, you will probably be "shanked" or "have a cap popped in yo ass"
by noodlesoficeUK January 15, 2009
mugGet the Chavmug.

Chav

Stinked up freaks of nature that THINK there hard when they see a person with long hair or when there in group of 5 or more. they really need to start looking after there kids instead of getting battered all the time. lol at chavs
Chav: Brap Brap, wot you looking mate you bein cheeky?

Long haired man: Wot?! you Better shut that mouth before you get a slap you little tramp!

Chav: *while walking away* il get you battered mate *repeats many times*

*Chav leaves*

Long haired man:... wot a chav.
by fozzy bear May 13, 2009
mugGet the Chavmug.

chav

Darwins theory believes that man evolved from primates evolved from fish etc etc. However a recent discovery means that there is now evidence that man 'devolves' on occasion, thus the 'chav'. 'Chavs' (council housed and violent) are a top competitor for the lowest form of life on the planet. From a distance they look like the average human being but there are five major diffrences.

1.intelligence, on average chavs have an IQ of around 30 this means that they are as smart as the average gorilla. They have 'adapted' to change the entire english language and often do not even use words that they cant pronounce or dont understand. This means that "excuse me could you tell me where the nearest boutique is please". Becomes "nah where da fooks maccy d's too like?".
2.Skin. As you know the human being is usually either black or white... Chavs are orange.
3.Pack hunters. Despite the fact that they think they are 'hard' this rule only applies when what they are fighting is
A) smaller than them.
B) not carrying a weapon.
C) the chavs have weapons.
D) the person/animal is not likely to fight back.
If you do encouter a chav on it's own it is not likely to start on you without provoction, if it does all you have to do is pull a knife out, they will generally back away or failing that, laugh at them they will not be able to stand the humiliation.
4.breeding. One of britains main problems is that chavs breed like rat's and start at a very early age, by the age of 17 the chavette will have at least four children of many diffrent creeds and colours, sadly they usually abandon the chavling at the age of 5days to fend for it's self and it starves to death. (note: i know it's sad... but the poor little sod's probably better off anyway) all of the services needed for the child are ALLWAYS provided for by the taxpayer. this also aplies to chav transport see: chavmobile
5.mouthy. Chavs live under the false impression that we all want to be like them, if you are not a chav then in the eyes of one you are either a) a nerd. or b) a emo. however we all know this is not true.
t=The chav abolishment act of 2009 means that chavs are not allowed out between the hours of 00:00-23:59. If they are spotted they can be shot on sight.
by nonnymouse January 14, 2008
mugGet the chavmug.

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