Pythagorean Theorem

States that the square of the hypotenuse is equal to the sum of the squares of the other two sides. While this is useful in math class, you won't be using it when you are bagging groceries or working retail or selling Nerf Guns.

Student: Ms.? When will we use the Pythagorean Theorem in real life?
Teacher: Well, um, real estate agents often use it to find out how much a house is worth?
Students: Ekscuze me waddahell

by Dick Clicker September 20, 2018

Believing Theorem

The believing theorem consists of three basic believes one should follow: 1. If you believe you will achieve, 2. If you believe you will receive, and 3. If you believe you will deceive. This theorem is widely accepted by many scientists who have spent their whole lives researching this wondrous topic and has yet to be denied by general belief. One must truly believe in the theorem for one to experience and succumb to its full effect.

Example 1.

Selena: Why do you think so many people don't win the lottery each year, Mel?

Mel: It's particularly simple, Sel. All there is to it is the Believing theorem.

Selena: Woah! What is that?

Mel: Not enough people do believe, so they don't receive.

Selena: It all makes sense now.

Example two:

Kid: I don't think I can win the food competition, mom.

Mom: Why not honey?

Kid: I can't can't eat two thousand cookies mom. I'm only nine.

Mom: Baby, like your grandfather, used to say " If you believe you will achieve. "
Kid: Woah... It all makes sense now. You are right mom!

by Carla.pickel June 1, 2018

pikachu theorem of physcology

this theorem states for any banana popsicle on a motorcycle, we will always have a cross difference between yes and no.

lol i win any debate cuz of the pikachu theorem of physcology

by ₳ Ɽ₳₦ĐØ₥ ₳₥Ø₲Ʉ₴1 October 13, 2022

Farrell’s Theorem

Even worse than Murphy’s Law. Farrell’s Theorem states that anything that can go wrong will not gl wrong, just simply do something even worse can happen instead. This also provides comedic effect.

Due t Farrell’s Theorem Franklin missed getting hit by the car, just so the bus behind could obliterate him.

by Slydog11 December 17, 2021

Quadralic Theorem

You dumb as hell if you think this a real thing.
Thiccoldman thinks you retarded.

You dumb as hell if you thought the quadralic theorem was a real thing

by Thiccoldman December 29, 2021

Paslay’s Theorem

Paslay’s Theorem states that the length of the penis is more accurately described by the ratio between weight, height and penis length. Paslay’s Theorem is known to describe the phenomenon of short and skinny men seeming to have large penises regardless of length.

Damn that man is packing! No man it’s just Paslay’s Theorem.

by Signumsixty April 3, 2022

Lion king theorem

When two people have an argument. They play the lion king movie in the background, one guy can only speak while simba is on screen and the other may speak while simba is off screen.

The presidential debate is on tonight ? Fuck a mediator let’s use the lion king theorem.

by Spinter April 22, 2021