by Boorishisepic April 15, 2021
Get the Little non epic mug.A heroic viking who was on the verge of Godhood. Thor, fearing being usurped, erased his memories and cast him into the 21st century.
Confused and distraught, EBM had a troubled youth, before he found his calling and went to Nam' to kick Commie ass. He single-handedly pushing back the Tet Offensive and became basis for fictional heroes such as Rambo.
Alas, it was not meant to be, the hippies of the US united against him and he was forced to relinquish his gun and vow to never fight again.
For the next few decades the US continued to deteriorate around him. EBM, being a incarnation of justice, could stand this no longer. A worthless mortal, clearly unaware of the might of the EBM, crossed him, and was promptly obliterated by EBM.
EBM spared that mortal's life and walked off the bus, leaving his groceries behind. Why did he even need groceries? Not once in his life did he ever need to eat, nor has he ever felt thirst, pain or the urge to sleep. EBM has tried his entire life to be a normal man, but he was tired of that facade. He was determined to find out what he truly was. That day, he walked off the bus, a God.
EBM was not the only immortal on the scene. Freyja, watched the event unfold through the eyes of Amber Lamps. Outwardly, her expression never changed, projecting an aura of indifference. Inwardly however, she was aflutter with a myriad of thoughts and emotions. She could not discern what it all truly meant, but one thing was for certain; Thor's days were numbered.
Confused and distraught, EBM had a troubled youth, before he found his calling and went to Nam' to kick Commie ass. He single-handedly pushing back the Tet Offensive and became basis for fictional heroes such as Rambo.
Alas, it was not meant to be, the hippies of the US united against him and he was forced to relinquish his gun and vow to never fight again.
For the next few decades the US continued to deteriorate around him. EBM, being a incarnation of justice, could stand this no longer. A worthless mortal, clearly unaware of the might of the EBM, crossed him, and was promptly obliterated by EBM.
EBM spared that mortal's life and walked off the bus, leaving his groceries behind. Why did he even need groceries? Not once in his life did he ever need to eat, nor has he ever felt thirst, pain or the urge to sleep. EBM has tried his entire life to be a normal man, but he was tired of that facade. He was determined to find out what he truly was. That day, he walked off the bus, a God.
EBM was not the only immortal on the scene. Freyja, watched the event unfold through the eyes of Amber Lamps. Outwardly, her expression never changed, projecting an aura of indifference. Inwardly however, she was aflutter with a myriad of thoughts and emotions. She could not discern what it all truly meant, but one thing was for certain; Thor's days were numbered.
by Acsension March 19, 2010
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A 4Chan Meme that never seems to win, and fails in epic proportions. You can always see EFG in the infamous Guy Fawkes mask.
by Tokeyo Beat January 12, 2008
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Get the epic retard mug.Metal with lyrics relating to dragons, unicorns, swords, etc., such as Blind Guardian, Rhapsody, Dragonforce.
by Kraut! May 11, 2006
Get the epic metal mug.A site where the objective is to spam the most in a chatroom, create make-believe friends over the internet, and compose bullshit theories about a game where a majority of victory is based on luck. Known for pissers who usually rage like hell, because points in an online game are all that they have in their miserable existence. This usually contributes to people committing suicide and/or falling into a coma and turning into a vegetable.
Birthplace of online gonorrhea.
Birthplace of online gonorrhea.
by laexio January 2, 2012
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