When you have messed up really bad and your boyfriend/girlfriend is to the point of something drastic. Such as breaking up. Time to step it up, asshole and put on the pants.
Person: I messed up big time. My girlfriend is going to be so upset. I think she is going to break up with me!
Person 2: You know what time it is then
Person 1: No, What?!
Person 2: It's Apology Pants Time!
Person 2: You know what time it is then
Person 1: No, What?!
Person 2: It's Apology Pants Time!
by Jenasis December 21, 2018
The Strickland apology: “I’ll apologize, I’ll even take back what I said. I’ll remove posts, I’ll kill you and ruin your life and mine way before we step into the cage” -Strickland
by Panderift June 06, 2024
To make an apology for something relatively insubstantial, even mostly irrelevant, while simultaneously refusing to acknowledge something more grievous.
Bonus points if the apology is insultingly insincere and the apologist demands privacy and respect.
Named after Matt Hancock, Secretary of State for Health and Social Care of the UK, who was filmed having an extramarital romantic liaison - kissing and groping - an aide he personally hired. Hancock refused to acknowledge the romantic and sexual element of this interaction and, instead, chose to apologise for "breaching social distancing guidelines." He then asked for privacy for this "personal matter", alluding to the alleged affair sighted, while completely refusing to acknowledge the affair.
Bonus points if the apology is insultingly insincere and the apologist demands privacy and respect.
Named after Matt Hancock, Secretary of State for Health and Social Care of the UK, who was filmed having an extramarital romantic liaison - kissing and groping - an aide he personally hired. Hancock refused to acknowledge the romantic and sexual element of this interaction and, instead, chose to apologise for "breaching social distancing guidelines." He then asked for privacy for this "personal matter", alluding to the alleged affair sighted, while completely refusing to acknowledge the affair.
Jane: "You cheated on me over 15 years, murdered my mother, and stole all of my money. Why did you do all of this, you wasteman?"
Matt: "To invoke the Hancock apology, I am sorry that I ate all of your green Gummy Bear sweets. It was very wrong of me and I apologise. I would now like you to respect my privacy on this personal matter."
Matt: "To invoke the Hancock apology, I am sorry that I ate all of your green Gummy Bear sweets. It was very wrong of me and I apologise. I would now like you to respect my privacy on this personal matter."
by BroJayDee June 26, 2021
Hym "I'm sorry for openly stating that I totally see why people want and/or seek out to kill you and/or your kids (in the context of my experiences with people who are not me). I'm sorry that you are not an authority to which I can be held accountable. I'm sorry that your behavior is not the direct result of my behavior. To believe that YOUR BEHAVIOR... Is the result of my behavior... Is to insinuate that I somehow both control your behavior... And did it wrong in such an egregious fashion... That I now need to cede authority over my own behavior... To you... Indefinitely... And, in contradictory fashion, I also DON'T control your behavior... Because I cannot and should not be able to stop you from behaving as you are now... Nor am I justified in seeking to affect your behavior... Because I'm only allow to control your behavior by doing things you don't like and then allowing you to use your behavior as social punishment... But I'm NOT ALLOWED to control your behavior by telling you what you can or cannot do... And I'm going to apologize one last time... Because... If you believe anything even VAGUELY ANALOGOUS to what I just said... You... ARE IN FACT... AN ABSOLUTE FUCKING RETARD! That is a Schrodinger's box-esque narcissistic delusion where I am both in control of how you behave and not in control of how you behave."
by Hym Iam August 28, 2023
by DrappingDino January 25, 2021
What? No... For what?
A stupid fucking retard with a whore for a wife "Are you gonna apologize!?"
Hym "What? No. For what? Literally everything I do is heroism. I'm better than everyone... What is there to apologize for? Oh! That! Yeah, no, you're right. I'm sorry. It isn't fair for me to be this much better than literally everyone. But don't blame me. And don't blame yourself... Blame you God for making you such retarded, repugnant, filth. You and your kids. It's gross. And whatever did this to you deserves to die."
Hym "What? No. For what? Literally everything I do is heroism. I'm better than everyone... What is there to apologize for? Oh! That! Yeah, no, you're right. I'm sorry. It isn't fair for me to be this much better than literally everyone. But don't blame me. And don't blame yourself... Blame you God for making you such retarded, repugnant, filth. You and your kids. It's gross. And whatever did this to you deserves to die."
by Hym Iam December 20, 2024
Dear Reptilian Commander Stharzak this is Karen born a girl switched with a boy at birth Philip Piquet Vargas May 12th of the year 1989 from the Aurora Universe #1, Milky Way Galaxy of planet Earth. I have not been evolved since 1 years old by foul play you may know about and have thus been DNA Tampered to just a 3D Human with hardly any powers or abilities that is easily manipulated by micro chips or mind control brain implants known as MK ULTRA MONARCH initially created by the Central Intelligence Agency of the United States, also my consciousness has become so damaged that other Extra Terrestrials think in me and not all my thoughts are my own. My disrespectful comments towards you on the internet possibly had something to do with that or it was free will and individuality and I am a ignorant idiot who is legally disabled with schizophrenia by the state of Illinois. I apologize and am sorry to you Reptilian Commander Stharzak for my disrespectful comments over the internet, please find it in your heart to semi or fully forgive me and please don’t let me go to jail for some supposed FBI agent on Facebook Messenger as well as please have you and all your forces regenerate resurrect my 3D Human form, brain tissue and consciousness back to fully functioning constantly and body guard me successfully with prize or gift bounties to do that to me please I beg of you
by The Gods & Goddesses September 19, 2023