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Jesus Christ

A lame guy who is against LGBT but at the same time he has strong gay tendencies
He thinks he has no physical father

Because his mother is sadly a prostitute for bad conditions of miserable life
Jesus Christ: Hey i wanna be a messiah who is my father btw
Mary: I dont remember that day probably i am raper by a group but once i was a virgin because i serve anal and oral intercourse to my customers. Where is my birth control pills?
by Butt Hair of Gerald Witcher October 4, 2023
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Jesus Face

1) Being composed with a look of serenity &/or seriousness. Level of calm that should be feared. State of mind for getting down to business.

2)The facade of Christian composure.
I have my Jesus face on and am ready to deal with those whiny little bitches at work.

Did you see those Christians totally lose it? The didn't have their Jesus face on.
by angrychick October 2, 2009
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Meet Jesus

A metaphor for death. To meet Jesus is to die, be judged and then meet Jesus. You can meet Jesus by eating KFC (Kentucky From China), or from being unable to frigth back to your instain mother.
Plistinblitzen: I'm the bab
by gotta love me!
Gecock42069: time to kill the baby.
Plistinblitzen: oofenheimer, I have been did done did.
Alphanumeral: ok fux, I'm the only 乇乂ㄒ尺卂 ㄒ卄丨匚匚one here so Lenny talk.
Gecock42069: you haven't gone to SUPRA BINYOT LANDE yet.
Plistinblitzen: *fucking dies*
Hodgepodgeman123: I'm with him. *Fucking dies*
Gecock42069: ┌∩┐(◣_◢)┌∩┐
Alphanumeral: I uhh.. need to go meet Jesus bye-bye!
Alphanumeral: *fucking dies*
by Lightwalker360 March 14, 2020
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jesus sweat

A term used for a nigga that worships the ground the he himself walks on.
by blank space June 18, 2014
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Jesus move

Jesus Move

To die and come back to life somehow (for any reason) to kick some major butt!
Gandalf pulled a major Jesus move in The Two Towers.
by DNT2 October 30, 2013
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because jesus

Used (usually sarcastically) to "explain" why homosexuality/LGBT/abortion/marijuana/brown people/citizens of countries other than the US/what have you is "bad".
Imaginary interviewer to Pat Robertson: "Why are you so opposed to the rapidly expanding normalization of non-traditional sex roles?"
Robertson: "Because Jesus."
by TheThroat October 4, 2017
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slim jesus

a complete copy of Eminem (Slim Shady) with only one song that actually went viral a doesn't have any flow and is trash
person 1: hey
person 2: have you heard of the soundcloud rapper
person 1: which one
person 2: i forgot his name, but he is a total slim jesus
person 1: oh god
by swaggerblob November 12, 2017
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