nose trumpet

When a person blows their nose so hard that it sounds like

Dizzy Gillespie getting warmed up before his next set. Usually caused when one nasal passage is held closed with a tissue while the other is left slightly open. Sometimes sounds like a loud fart which often confuses innocent bystanders as they expect to smell the familiar scent of ass but are left feeling disappointed due to a lack of closure. Multiple blasts of the horn may be heard repeatedly, especially if one has a cold or allergies or has built up a lot of congestion. Just as a cellist utilizes their bow, a nose trumpeter uses his tissue paper to craft subtle harmonics and vibratos which perfectly accompany the sounds of nasal fluid blasting out of his nose holes at 100 miles per hour.
Every office job usually has at least one of these talented horn players, and late in the day when the office is quiet you can often hear their stunning performances echoing across the cube farm. Note that nose trumpeting is a finely honed skill, so when you're just starting to play you may only be able to play a single, very loud pitch. This is expected, but with consistent practice, you'll be covering your favorite jazz standards in no time.

Looks like Bill's playing his nose trumpet for the entire office again.

by stuckonearth November 27, 2021

Nose cancelling ear pugs

When the boys of the house make a smell you don't want to hear about.

Nose cancelling ear pugs , I don't want that smell in my nose, I'm plugging my ear holes because I can hear that smell.

by Duertromety December 1, 2021

Nose cocking

The act of wearing one’s face covering to protect their mouth but deliberately under their nose

Hey, look at that ‘nose cocking’ twat! Does he not realise his nose is also part of his respiratory system?

by Cras13 December 4, 2021

Bloody Nose Story

A story that contains no purposeful reason for its telling. it yields no enrichment for the listeners, and typically is comical in its lack of importance.

For example, the original bloody nose story of Ainsley stating “I once had a bloody nose at my friends house” and that being the entirety of the story.

by ainsleyb123 December 4, 2021

Helicopter nose

A guy whose nose snores like the sound of a helicopter while sleeping.

Last night, I could not sleep because of my roommate's helicopter nose.

by deimos-dread January 8, 2020

Tomato nose

When u have cold and your nose turns red.

I have a tomato nose (Rudolph nose) since yesterday

by Shwim January 20, 2020

Nose Relish

That lone booger you manage to discretely pick from your nose and hide amongst the relish on the hot dog cart.

I am pretty sure that guy has my snot on his hot dog. How does the nose relish taste buddy?

by Angus McCracken January 25, 2020