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life-is-a-loada-wank

when you're going through so much bullshit in your life at one point which makes you anxious and pissed off and you start to feel your world is coming to an end.
Bob: Hey Dan

Dan: Hi Bob what's up

Bob: Have you ever felt like your life-is-a-loada-wank

Dan: I know what you mean, man its fucked up
by Arfbizit May 26, 2011
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Tactical COD Wank

1) a quick wank over any call of duty game when you get an awesome kill or hear the interigation guy on the main menu of black ops

2) having a wank while on call of duty
(upon getting an accross the map tomahawk)
dave: brb guys

(returns tired)
dave: back
jack: did you have a tactical cod wank!?
dave: maybe
by urbandictionary360 January 21, 2011
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pokey bum wank

To sexually exite yourself until you reach a climax via ones bum hole
"Can you smell that?"
"Andys Having an other one of his pokey bum wanks"
by Andys Mom June 20, 2007
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Logistically Challenging Wank

A wank with some challenges.

For instance, your phone may be nearly out of battery, so you have to hold your phone and charger at a particular angle to keep it charging. The movement will dislodge the charger at the worst possible moment, with the risk of phone dying being a real threat.
"Bruh I had a logistically challenging wank last night, Jesus Christ it was more difficult than doing the Christmas shopping
by cancerisnotaverygoodthing November 21, 2018
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Luxury Wanking Device

A term used to describe one's girlfriend or, more specifically, her gash.
1. I don't love you. You're just a luxury wanking device.

2. I've got a new luxury wanking device.

3. Can I borrow your luxury wanking device?
by gash rash July 5, 2011
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Porky Bum Wank

To masturbate while rapidly fingering your ass hole
Ahh had a nice porky bum wank yesterday
by Hippo boy 24 August 26, 2017
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The Big Wank Theory

A theory that says that the universe, life, and everything in between is the result of God releasing premature ejaculation.
I just explained to my astronomy teacher about The Big Wank Theory and now I am sitting in ISS.
by Pickle Richard October 11, 2019
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