captain birdseye

someone who doesnt shut up, waffles all the time. comes from birdseye potato waffles's mascot.
see hassle loads

Me: jen allen wrecks my head, she never shuts up.

Friend: yeah shes a captain birdseye for sure!

by red_knickers January 5, 2010

Captain & Tennille

When in the Military, when you (a Captain) and your wife do a 3-way with the next door neighbor.

Ex: "We just had a 'Captain & Tennille', with the neighbor"

by Scotti B May 2, 2022

Captain H-Ball

Any extremely intoxicated boat captain from a mix of cocaine, mushrooms and cheap beer.

Dam Captain H-Ball we almost hit the channel marker doing 60mph in a no wake zone. Arrrr past me the straw and platter and let me arrrrr powder the nose.

by Captain Smoothwater September 2, 2022

Captain Wankstash

A name first used in spoken conversation when referring to the fictional character Simon from the TV series The Walking Dead, who supported an excessively flamboyant moustache and cheesy grin. This, coupled with his attempts to emulate his boss Negan and general wankerism led to the formation of the moniker.
Similar examples would be: Douchie McDouchebag; Sergeant Dickface; Lord Twat of Knobington Manor, etc, of which the original creator of the name Captain Wankstash seemingly has an endless supply.

Can also be written Captain Wankstache

Suggested use: for mustachioed military/ uniformed non-military types, with attitudes far in excess of their competence /accomplishment. Is not restricted to this use but it's a good fit for it.

Who was that guy? You know, Captain Wankstache.

Alright Captain Wankstash, calm down/give it a rest.

Here we go, Captain Wankstache is at it again.

by FecktardIntolerant May 12, 2023

Captain Bants

Captain Bants: Someone that has organised an activity involving friends that are unfamiliar with each other. this person is the link between all people present. this person is often the most knowledgeable, experienced, familiar with the activity or location of the activity. It is this persons responsibility to set the tone and pace not only of the activity but the banter as well. Example, Best man on stag do.

Captain Bants must lead by example if the stag do is going to be a success.

by Boss Wilson's the name. January 20, 2012

captain bro

A "Captain Bro" is a term used for an Airline Pilot Captain who's super chill in the cockpit and out. He's layed back and enjoys a good craft beer a good time and never gets excited about anything. His co-pilots marvel at his airmenship skills and the amount of "fucks" he doesn't give. He uses the word "fuck or bro" like its a comma. When he's not ripping across the sky at 500mph he's a beach bum at heart. Hes fit, tan and just got back from 3 weeks in Tahiti. Don't leave him alone with your wife or gf because he'll hit on her and blame it on you. When he walks through the airport women want him and men want to be him. The airline industry desperately needs more "Captain Bros" bro!

Last night Captain Bro and I went out for drinks and next thing I knew we were at the titty bar slamming shots and double fisting beers. Today he said he thinks he lost his pinky ring messing around with that strippers C-section scar. I told him don't do it but he's a captain bro he doesn't give a FUCK!

by Skyking007 October 12, 2015

Snack Captain

The person in the relationship who thinks they’re the better snack buyer, but usually a person who uses this term selfishly is not.

I.E “I am the snack captain and pretzels are a good snack.”
Also
“You’re just mad you’re not the snack captain because you like candy.”

by Ewa WooWa December 27, 2022