Cabbage jesus

A overweight cunt who is full of life and loves to joke around with anyone. He loves to make friends and will even share his lunch with you. He will go out of his way for anyone!

Bro 1: did u just see that guy? he just gave the homeless family 100 dollars!
Bro 2: yeah! he always does that his name is cabbage jesus..
Bro 1: what a mad cunt we should meet him sometime..

Bro 2: hell yeah!

by Cabbage jesus May 12, 2019

Size of Jesus

Describing an object or thing as really big. Size of Jesus is a unit of measurement

"I saw a big spider in the hallway last night"
"How big was it?"
"Mate it was the size of Jesus"

by Normieroxanne July 8, 2018

blasian jesus

Black Asian that is very kind but is very dirty

You are a Blasian Jesus

by Annoying 101 March 29, 2017

Space Jesus

literally just obi wan kenobi.

he looks like jesus.
he acts like jesus.
he is jesus.
he even has the high ground.

be like space jesus.

"its over anakin i have the high ground" - space jesus
"you underestimate my power" - fallen deciple

by yeetus bazinga October 18, 2022

Sexy Jesus

When people are actually attracted to Jesus because of his handsome appearance.

Ironically, Jesus wasn't actually all that good looking according to the bible:

"He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him, nothing in his appearance that we should desire him."-Isaiah 53:2

Most people seem to be attracted to Sexy Jesus when in reality Jesus wasn't all that beautiful

by Nordicdragon June 27, 2018

Jesus Hands

A taunt used with your arms spread open and slightly halfway raised, as though being crucified, while approaching someone.

"This mfker's coming up hard with them Jesus hands.."
" I came at em with my Jesus hands."

by SplishSplashOnMyRash November 29, 2017

jesus erection

when a man is able to reach erection quickly after ejacultion.

Dude i totally had a jesus erection last night in bed.

by witchslayer69 May 19, 2018