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Bacon Turtle

A Turtle, usually a King Turtle of the Royal Turtle Guard. Also a word for assorted meats shaped like a turtle.

A Bacon Turtle loves bacon and spreads the word and belief of Bacon. Bacon Turtles and Turtles alike are enemies of the Panda Army and the Penguin Union. The King Bacon Turtle was defeated at The Puffin-Koala Gap by the Pan-da Warriors in PANDA 7 (Panda Years), and he later retreated to plot an all-out war on the Panda Army. The Bacon Turtle and his Royal Turtle Guard is no match for the Elite Pan-da Warriors.

The Bacon Turtle began at a humble little wood building on the corner of a busy street, titled: Bacon Turtle & Associates. They sold chocolate-covered bacon and bacon shaped like turtles. Since then, they have grown into a legitomato army. The Bacon Turtle and his associates are the exclusive members of the I Don't Care Club. The Turtle Motto is "Viva la Bacon, TGIF" (Long Live Bacon, Thank God It's Friday).
Bacon Turtle: Kneel before your almighty ruler, the Bacon Turtle!
Panda: No.
Bacon Turtle: Then you will face a life of bacon deprivation. Take him away, Royal Turtle Guard!
Panda: Is this some sort of torture, because I'm not addicted to bacon...
Bacon Turtle: Are you insulting my religion? Do you wish to say that you are against bacon? You will be locked in a room with bacon!
Panda: Free bacon is fine with me...

Epic Meal Time: We're cooking up some BACON, AND TURTLES! THAT MEANS BACON TURTLES!
by Panda Army Representative January 16, 2014
mugGet the Bacon Turtlemug.

Bacon

Greasy food that can either be crispy or fatty but but most foodies like it when it has the perfect balance between crispy and fatty to enjoy this wonderful creation from God.
I love this bacon.
by Cra-cra2007 July 13, 2019
mugGet the Baconmug.

Bacon handjob

Guy 1: "Hey bro, I heard you fucked with Becky, that fat cunt."
Guy 2: "I didn't spread those legs, I just got a bacon handjob."
by Gamerdactyl February 14, 2019
mugGet the Bacon handjobmug.

Baconized

The act of adding unholy amounts of bacon to anything.
can you pass the baconized spinach please?
by Sky blaster December 16, 2019
mugGet the Baconizedmug.

Baconizing

Where a person is laying on somewhere (more specifically a couch or bed) like a fat ugly lazy ass pig.

bonus points if you’re baked (high)
1: “did you see caysie? she was totally baconizing!”

2: “yeah, what a fat lazy baconizer”
by dylan_poggers July 17, 2024
mugGet the Baconizingmug.

bacon bill

Bacon bill fuck eemmmmmm hahhahaahava
by anonymous January 13, 2023
mugGet the bacon billmug.

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