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spreading joy

The phrase refers to the process of letting a massive amount of fart gas out in a carefully metered way- usually by farting silently while walking. In this manner, a disasterously huge amount of fart may be discretely dispensed over a larger geographical area. When faced with the prospect of needing to fart in a socially awkward situation, a person often resorts to initially letting a test fart. If the test fart indicates a vile, deadly amount of gas, the person may opt to walk (for example) from the punch bowl across the dance floor, and over to the bar- all the while silently farting the whole way. People at the punch bowl will begin vomiting, the dance floor will clear and the bar area patrons may begin to pass out. Meanwhile, the farter may actually be dozens of feet away, thus escaping blame. In such a way, the farter is said to be "spreading joy."
Damn, Frank is such an idiot. He farted over by the band and kept walking. He's spreading joy all over the wedding reception. How disgusting!
by Frank Klaune September 1, 2005
mugGet the spreading joymug.

anal spread

A delicious alternative to the bush taco, wherein a solid and juicy shit is spread on bread, toast or eaten with carrots and celery. Intense vommiting may follow.
I have a piece of bread but I have no peanut butter. I do however have anal spread, well I will in about 5 minutes.
by esparagus partridge October 21, 2009
mugGet the anal spreadmug.

Ted Spreading

If A Fat Hairy Man Spreads His Legs Too Far It Is Considered Ted Spreading
My Uncle, While He Was Sitting In A Train Was Ted Spreading
by MyDadTedSpreadsInBed May 12, 2020
mugGet the Ted Spreadingmug.

street spread

juicy celebrity gossip thats spreading like wildfire
have you heard the latest street spread about that Kardashian slut?
by The Realest Deal October 2, 2009
mugGet the street spreadmug.

windmill spread

A deviant act that has most of the events of an eskimo trebuchet, but with a few shit twists. A windmill spread is where the man puts his dick between his legs and is being sucked off from behind, but then sharts all over the face of the blow-jobber. He then rubs his Peter all over their shart-ridden face, coating his cock in the slippery shit, before finally spreading flecks of squit into the air by willy-windmilling for the blow-jobber to catch in their gob.
"Jeremy made me a windmill spread last night after he got squits from that dodgy takeaway down the lower end of the High Street. I've got lockjaw now, but I'm still one lucky lady."
by Leper96 October 21, 2019
mugGet the windmill spreadmug.

spreading the goose

Spreading your vagina on a Twich stream.
Dude, she was totally spreading the goose to increase subs. She'll make partner for sure!
by 2dFx October 16, 2018
mugGet the spreading the goosemug.

spread & wed

The only thing a beautiful girl has to do in this narcissist reality...
Why should some hot model have to work? She just has to meet some rich fool and do the ol 'spread & wed.'
by Skizzy Wydd November 5, 2020
mugGet the spread & wedmug.

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