Percussive Maintenance

The fine art of hitting or lightly tapping on an object to make it function as expected

*bOOM bOOM bOOM*
A: What the hell is going on down there?!
B: I'm just doing some Percussive Maintenance on the TV!

by We are anonymous, Expect us. June 1, 2020

Preventative Maintenance

Preventative Maintenance (PM)

Spray with water hose... Carefully dousing all electrical components.... Finished off with a blow job from the air hose.

Bill did preventative maintenance on the compressor for the pull head machine, it now does not work.

by WrongMonday2020 January 28, 2022

Afrikaans pole maintenance

Where someone cuts a ceiling fan in half while the lights are off.

What are you doing? Afrikaans pole maintenance?

by Qi_87 April 21, 2023

turf maintenance

The trimming and shaving of your genital area and or arm pits.

Dan said to Jenny " Thank god you practice turf maintenance or we wouldn't be together!"

by rene bootmaker June 3, 2013

Cussing Maintenance

The act of shouting obscenities at something in order to make it work or fit.

Friend: “What are you doing yelling?
Friend 2: I’m preforming Cussing Maintenance”
Friend: “What?”
Friend 2: “FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT, YOU BETTER WORK YOU GOD DAMN MOTHERFUCKING TWAT ROTTED CUNT!

by ILuvU4What February 22, 2023

Turkish Maintenance

Inadequate, half-assed, widespread negligence, inability to follow basic standard engineering procedures using sub-standard materials when maintaining or repairing large mechanical items. Influenced by the cultural belief that all is "as God wills."

Please don't use Turkish Maintenance on my new Outback. I paid 18K for it and I need it to get to work for the next 10 years.

Current condition of the Parthenon in Athens can be seen as an early benchmark of what is now called "Turkish Maintenance."

by sparklingdark December 17, 2016

maintenance-sex

Generally used in long term relationships to satisfy one or both partners needs when the sexual tension just needs to be released quickly with no performance expectations. Usually benefits one partner, but can be mutually beneficial as well.

My balls are blue this week, and I just can't get to sleep. Do you have a minute for maintenance-sex?

by mememetoo March 11, 2025