Schrodinger's Lawyer

A lawkeeper who decides whether they're client should plead guilty based on the verdict of the jury

Jury: *Whispering* Yeah, he's probably guilty

Schrodinger's Lawyer: Nows your chance!

Client: I plead guilty to the first degree murder of a family of 4

Jury: Oh, we were going to say he's not guilty, but whatever

Client: Aaaaaaaaaagggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh

Schrodinger's Lawyer: Oops

by KorokDude August 25, 2023

A Lawyer's Grief

Her son developed a form of schizophrenia... But wait! Schizophrenia doesn't usually develop until their 20s!

Hym "You did it again and your kids got murdered for it AGAIN and it lead to ' a lawyer's grief.' He probably knows who I am. That's why he's grieving. This is not the natural consequences of the things I have done. You are doing this to avoid being wrong. That IS the natural consequences of the things you're doing. THIS is an aberration."

by Hym Iam February 9, 2025

Trump Lawyer

Low quality legal representation.

You got a speeding ticket, Mary? Well, don't hire that Trump Lawyer with the billboard off the interstate, you'll wind up convicted of treason.

by blahblahblahblahbla May 16, 2018

minecraft lawyer

A person who constructs concepts that have to practical application

James is such a minecraft lawyer he lives in his own world and tries to get everyone else to follow.

by mancraft April 9, 2020

Lawyer

Those lawyers never tell the truth.

Man, he's such a lawyer, he never tells the truth!

by Non Partisan October 18, 2020

Anti-lawyer

The reverse lawyer, breaks the law to get evidence, doesn't care about anyone except their client, will kill, to prove you are not guilty.

Person 1: Hey bro look who's against puff, what a moron!
Person 2: Bro, thats the Anti-lawyer, he should be worried.

by Bunga69420 July 3, 2022

Lawyer Red

The guy that is red with rage when you tell him they are not a real lawyer and never will be one. A Lawyer Red will often pretend to know about law and will watch law and order religiously to learn more. Lawyer Reds will also often carry around a copy of the constitution to prove they know more about law than you

"Oh do not try to talk to him about law, he is a total Lawyer Red and will try to out talk you"

by TheCrimsnFuckr November 8, 2017