A person who finds it necessary to use a half roll of toilet paper (usually amounting to a half inch of TP cushioning) to line the toilet seat of public bathrooms out of fear of contracting an alien disease.
Also referred to as a daft defecator.
Also referred to as a daft defecator.
KB: WTF took you so long? That turd must have really been a fighter!
Russ: Not at all actually. I would have been out in five minutes had it not taken me ten to remove the remnants of a paranoid pooper before I could drop deucage.
"Hey man sorry it took so long, but a paranoid pooper like myself can never be too cautious before procuring a fat turd nugget.
Russ: Not at all actually. I would have been out in five minutes had it not taken me ten to remove the remnants of a paranoid pooper before I could drop deucage.
"Hey man sorry it took so long, but a paranoid pooper like myself can never be too cautious before procuring a fat turd nugget.
by Rusty Rustbucket October 27, 2010
Get the paranoid poopermug. An individual who takes a dump in a public restroom without flushing, usually in their place of employment or a place where they regularly poop. Generally, the phantom pooper abides by a set of ground rules:
1. Leave a phantom poop only if the restroom is empty so as to secure your anonymity. If another person enters the restroom while you are on the toilet, simply poop and wipe/flush as usual.
2. Throw no toilet paper in the toilet. This will allow you to show off your brown creation in its full glory, as well as leave the person who finds the phantom poop to think "Wow, no toilet paper, this must have been a ghost!"
3. Leave a phantom poop daily, ideally in the same stall at the same time. This will ensure general chaos and distrust in the workplace.
1. Leave a phantom poop only if the restroom is empty so as to secure your anonymity. If another person enters the restroom while you are on the toilet, simply poop and wipe/flush as usual.
2. Throw no toilet paper in the toilet. This will allow you to show off your brown creation in its full glory, as well as leave the person who finds the phantom poop to think "Wow, no toilet paper, this must have been a ghost!"
3. Leave a phantom poop daily, ideally in the same stall at the same time. This will ensure general chaos and distrust in the workplace.
A phantom pooper began work at Jame's office, creating chaos and distrust among his co-workers. Eventually they had to install sensor flushers in the toilets to foil the phantom pooper.
by Cornyhotdogs October 15, 2017
Get the Phantom Poopermug. by anon.gcfgv755r June 4, 2018
Get the pooper-intendentmug. Someone who "scoots" or nudges dog pop into the bushes instead of picking it up and disposing of it properly. Pooper scooters want people to think they are picking up after their dog when they really aren't.
Miles: Don't forget the pooper scooper!
McCord: it's cool I'll just kick it into some bushes or something.
Miles: Dude you're such a pooper scooter
McCord: it's cool I'll just kick it into some bushes or something.
Miles: Dude you're such a pooper scooter
by Andythemailman April 20, 2013
Get the Pooper Scootermug. The Pooper Scooper is a dominant male who is known for anal sex. There can only be one "Pooper Scooper" at a time. The Pooper Scooper is a ranking title and is the top rank of all men.
Mike: Yo Anthony! Word on the street is you are "The Pooper Scooper"!
Anthony: Hell yeah, I just did anal with this big booty bitch last night!
Anthony: Hell yeah, I just did anal with this big booty bitch last night!
by TheOfficialJasonS January 30, 2015
Get the The Pooper Scoopermug. by daybreak02 May 15, 2016
Get the pooper poppermug. by Mr. Pooper Sex June 2, 2008
Get the Pooper Sexmug.