One of the most mysterious aliases of the culprit and war criminal, 'Joe Willy'.
Noah Granola said he was going to build a Dyson sphere and blot out the sun, "You bitches need less light and my basement doesn't have enough space. I'm going to build I Dyson sphere once I kill the Russian president." to be specific. The number of people in his basement are unknown, and the location of his basement is also unknown. Noah Granola is a fucking bitch and burned down 3 native campsites in the past month.
Noah Granola said he was going to build a Dyson sphere and blot out the sun, "You bitches need less light and my basement doesn't have enough space. I'm going to build I Dyson sphere once I kill the Russian president." to be specific. The number of people in his basement are unknown, and the location of his basement is also unknown. Noah Granola is a fucking bitch and burned down 3 native campsites in the past month.
Noah Granola is an insane egotistical maniac who wants to kill the Russian president.
Don't be a Noah Granola.
Don't be a Noah Granola.
by Joe_Willy July 31, 2023
Get the Noah Granola mug.by THE REAL MAYO MAN April 28, 2021
Get the Granola Bar mug.A person who works in a white-collar, often finance or corporate environment, yet maintains a distinctly outdoorsy, health-conscious, or minimalist lifestyle. They thrive in the city and take advantage of its amenities — trendy coffee shops, boutique gyms, Whole Foods — but on weekends they’re hiking, climbing, or van camping. Think Patagonia vest by weekday, Patagonia puffer by weekend.
by FG Buff November 11, 2025
Get the Finance Granola mug.Outdoorsy wealthy poseur.
Wears expensive outdoor gear type clothing ALL of time, with brand labels exposed & conspicuous. Only talks about organic food and extreme sports.
Wears expensive outdoor gear type clothing ALL of time, with brand labels exposed & conspicuous. Only talks about organic food and extreme sports.
Chris and Bea are so Gucci Granola; their Toyota Tacoma has micro brew and social justice stickers all over the back.
The Gucci Granola chick outside Whole Foods wanted me to sign a petition to ban cars from the freeway.
The Gucci Granola chick outside Whole Foods wanted me to sign a petition to ban cars from the freeway.
by JHGC8 June 20, 2017
Get the Gucci Granola mug.a heterosexual white man that finishes after a singular stroke because of his built up testosterone from watching anime porn, usually named some basic shit like will or jackson
by akhxloqnx July 10, 2022
Get the granola mug.The desire to or actually have sex with those who are "hippie" or "granola" even though they may not be your normal sexual tastes. Kombucha is usually involved.
Subarus, rock climbing, all natural or sporadic bathing habits, and a dash of B.O. are typical traits of these "granola" or "hippie" folk.
Usually a one time experimental experience.
Subarus, rock climbing, all natural or sporadic bathing habits, and a dash of B.O. are typical traits of these "granola" or "hippie" folk.
Usually a one time experimental experience.
by a-letto March 19, 2021
Get the Granola Stomp mug.In essence, when one is acting like a granola bar, it means that they are acting in an unstable and unprecedented manner, that it evokes concern to all individuals nearby. Like Nature Valley Granola Bars, which tend to disintegrate easily. If an individual's mental health and overall lifestyle is showing signs of decline and instability, one could say that they are acting like a granola bar. In closure, to act like a granola bar means that you are fucking Wilding and acting crazy asf.
Person 1 background: recently lost their job, about to be evicted, has gotten numerous restraining orders in the last few days, hasn't taken care of their hygiene in a long ass time, and is doing black tar heroin on the double.
"Hey bro, you see that thicc ass Boulder near the highway?"
Person 2: "yeah what about it?"
Person 1: " yo we should like totally drive full speed towards it, it would be like so poggers lol"
Person 2:" imma be real with you, you have been acting like a granola bar recently, I think we should have an intervention"
"Hey bro, you see that thicc ass Boulder near the highway?"
Person 2: "yeah what about it?"
Person 1: " yo we should like totally drive full speed towards it, it would be like so poggers lol"
Person 2:" imma be real with you, you have been acting like a granola bar recently, I think we should have an intervention"
by reformedshibainu January 14, 2022
Get the Acting like a granola bar mug.