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That's Tits!

Phrase exclaiming happiness and joy upon hearing and/or learning good news.
Shannon came in the room and sat next to Nikki. For the first time this week she appeared happy. She whispered into Nikki's ear, "I got my period today ". Her smile was indeed infectious as it then spread across Nikki's face as he exclaimed "That's Tits! It really is, lover. But I still need church in my life and I need the type of religion that I can only find at the altar that is between your legs". Grinning in agreement, Shannon rousted Nikki from his chair so that he might get to "church" on time.
by Nikki Stixx June 16, 2020
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Buffalo Wild Shits

The inevitable uphill battle you wage against a toilet after eating a large meal at Buffalo Wild Wings. Occurs within 24 hours after eating large amounts of wings and involves loud farts and explosive chicken wing shaped diarrhea.
Joe: "Almost missed my train into the city just now cause I got struck with a brutal, ass-tearing round 2 of the Buffalo Wild Shits. No Sunday picnic, let me tell ya"."

John: "No kidding, I got them on the way to work this morning. Had to book it to a stall and the Buffalo Wild Shits made my bottom burn like mango habañero.
by a-Dawwwwwg December 12, 2011
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Jalapeno Shits

A more severe form of Jalapeno shit, the Jalapeno Shits are horrifically painful, burning diarrhoea that sticks to you like napalm and burns like the fires of Hell, they are the result of an over-indulgence of Mexican food, the worst attack is often the first time one consumes a copious amount of Jalapenos, symptoms of the Jalapeno Shits include:

*Not wanting to go more than a few yards from the loo
*Frequent, painful shit attacks
*Napalm-like burning diarrhoea, full of undigested Capsaicin and Jalapeno skins/seeds
*Frequent baths/showers in attack to wash the Lava-like crap from your sensitive pain receptors
*Groaning and/or weeping eyes
*Bad stomach upset
*Cursing whatever manner of cruel God decided to give a man's arse Capsaicin receptors

The only real remedy for the Jalapeno Shits is too take anti=indigestion medicine and ride it out, as well as washing your arse after each movement to give you comfort, the Capsaicin will pass, but you're in for one painful ride!
Person 1: Do you want to come out?
Person 2: No, sorry, I have the Jalapeno Shits, too much Mexican food last night, I'm in agony!
by Wardie1993 November 30, 2016
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Shopping Shits

A rush of adreneline causing the overwhelming and immediate urge to have a bowel movement upon entering a store where everything you see you think you MUST have.
Vicki: " Hey Valerie, wanna go to the mall? Nordie's is having their Half Yearly Sale AND I have a 20% off coupon!

Valerie: " Hell yeah, Im in! I saw the sale add today......Im soooo excited! Hope they have a clean bathroom 'cause I feel a case of the shopping shits coming on!"
by cheer1 October 16, 2012
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Pizza Hut Shits

The Day after eating Pizza Hut you get the shits all day. And the grease in your shit smells like Pizza hut.
I got the Fuckin Pizza Hut Shits .... Again. Give me a new pair of underwear!
by THUNDERLIPS13 December 3, 2010
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shitscale

A rating system used to classify an employees level.
The highest level is shitheads aka bosses.
Mid levels are asskissers aka upper management and brownosers aka lower management.
Lowest level is shitshovellers aka hardworkers.
According to the shitscale at work the shitheads go golfing while leaving the asskissers and brownoser in charge of the shitshovellers.
by jpg3 December 1, 2011
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Night Shits

The urgent need to shit late at night, typically waking the individual up from a deep sleep. This usually occurs between 1am and 4am. Upon waking up, the individual will feel a heavy cramping in their stomach and will be forced to walk hunched over to the washroom, where they have an ungodly bowel movement. Sitting hunched over on the toilet, the individual will typically be praying to God to either:
1. Put a stop to the shits after the next one emerges, or;
2. End their life rather than forcing them to endure another minute of this.
Upon completion, the individual will feel somewhat better, but be forced to wipe with a significant amount of toilet paper.

The night shit continues once the individual returns to bed. Immediately upon collapsing into their bed, the stomach will make a rumbling sound and the heavy cramped feeling will come back with a vengeance. This time, the individual may be forced to run back to the washroom. The same process then repeats itself. This time, the stomach will feel significantly better at the end.

Night shits are usually between 2 and 4 cycles of the above description.

Note: Not all shits that take place at night are "night shits" proper. They must conform to the above description. They are very rare, typically occurring between 1-3 times per year in the average individual.
Person A: "You look tired today."

Person B: "It's because I had a case of the night shits last night. They kept me up for 2 hours."

Person A: "I thought you smelled like shit."
by 00Zero00 December 20, 2010
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