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Hoe Protector

A.K.A: Hoetector

Some absolutely clueless soul that wrangles a hoe, slam pig, or cock tease into coming to a gathering and commits the atrocity of following her around constantly just to insure that she doesn't slam some other dude(s).

In order to be labeled a Hoe Protector you must fulfill the minimum requirements:

1.) The girl must be a documented hoe, either by previous personal knowledge or the fact that she has already open mouth kissed at least 4 dudes in the previous hour.

2.) There must be an inherent "creep" factor associated with the guy including, but not limited to; following or shadowing, constant staring, hover hands, forced seclusion, cock blocking, and bathroom guarding.

3.) (Hoe Protection to the 5th Degree only, see below) The guy constantly talks shit about the other dudes at the party in an attempt to make himself the number one draft pick for the hoe. (Seriously, who clipped your balls?)

Hoe Protection to the 5th Degree is a capital offense and if convicted in court, the defendant must admit his Hoe Protector status to both the offended parties and the hoe itself. If the defendant commits multiple counts of Hoe Protections over time, he can be labeled as a level 3 Hoe Protector and must notify all neighbors within a quarter mile radius of his level 3 status.
Mike: Whose that chick that Leo brought over? Is he slamming that?

Harry: Nothing special, shes just some pig fresh out of the pen. He wants to slam it, but hes too busy being a Hoe Protector to every dude that looks at her to win that battle.
by Chauncellor April 9, 2012
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seat protector

A large rounded piece of tissue paper that is designed to be placed over a toilet seat to protect the shitter from "germs" that may be residing there. The rounded section lies on top of the toilet seat (thus creating the essential Buttock-porcelain Barrier) while a cutout center flap hangs down into the toilet causing the entire paper to be sucked into the toilet when it is flushed. Seat protectors are typically contained in a dispenser on the wall of a public bathroom stall in such venues as airports and offices.
Note that the Buttock-Porcelain Barrier provided by the seat protector creates a false sense of security since someone else's bodily fluid on the toilet seat can leak right through the S.P.'s thin, porous surface. I doubt germs are foiled either.
Toilet User: Damn these seat protectors! I can't get one out of the dispenser without ripping it!

Toilet User: Ugh! Who keeps using 20 seat protectors at a time and clogging the handicap stall?
by creaternity May 23, 2006
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Bun Protector

An Aussie male is called a bun protector when he stops every other guy in the room from talking to a very available and very single girl.
No one can get a look in with that good sort with that bun protector hangin' around.
by wardswords November 29, 2016
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Lesbian Protector

Thor.
Thor is a fucking Lesbian Protector.
#ChangeMyMind
Thor: "I am the lesbian protector, mess with lesbians and you mess with me"

Lesbians: "We Love you"
by The Random Lesbian December 11, 2021
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fridge protector

Someone who relentlessly protects the fridge at all cost
"Aye Cedric you see that big ass fridge protector over there"
by Tsavage901 October 5, 2017
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Pocket Protector

A plastic shieve inserted in one's shirt pocket to prevent pens from leaking and staining the shirt.
As far as i am aware it was invented in the US, and never exported to the rest of the world.
Not popular anymore, even among geeks
Yo, jigga whats wit the pocket protector?
I keep my dust in there, bro
by Nerg June 7, 2004
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The Holy Protector Of Butt

a homosexual man that will deny being gay but he will look at large homosexual men and make definitions about them. He always wears a buttplug but he pours a lot of oil on it to make it come out "by accident". He has a fetish for cucumbers.
Guy 1: OMG its The Holy Protector of Butt
Guy 2: Look he dropped something!
Guy 1: Look it's a buttplug
The Holy Protector Of Butt: oh no my pants fell down!
Guy 1&2 get a boner and start to anal The Holy Protector Of Butt.
by Dr Jean O'Side November 24, 2019
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