jack shit

when you are taking a shit and getting a handjob at the same time

what'd you do last night?
Jack shit....
Oh that must've sucked...
No... no sucking... just a handjob

by jackshit March 5, 2008

jack shit

A poker hand, especially in Texas Hold 'Em, that includes a jack and an unsuited card under 10.

I'm gonna raise you and go all-in even though I have jack shit. Or, Aw, you're bluffin' me, I bet you have jack shit so I call.

by stinkygordo January 19, 2009

jack shit

A term to describe someone who has or will inevetible do something stupid

Man, you are such a jack shit!

by KROD December 13, 2004

jack shit

the feces of a jack, i.e. a jackass. By extension, anything worthless or trivial.

You don't know jack shit.

by bumpie July 26, 2008

Jack Shit

Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of
Knee-deep Schitt, Inc.
Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt and they had 6 children: Holie Schitt, The twins; Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt and Bull Schitt.
Jack and Noe divorced. Noe later married Mr. Sherlock and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock.
Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they had Chicken Schitt. Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt married the Happens
brothers in a dual ceremony.
The Schitt-Happens children are Dawg, Byrd and Horse. Bull Schitt left home to tour the world. He recently returned with his new bride, Pisa Schitt.

Now, when someone say's you don't know Jack Schitt, you can correct them.

- U don't know Jack Schitt
- Yes i do, he's Awe and O. Schitt's son

by Primitiva May 3, 2004

Jack Shit

An American gentleman, with whom certain people are unfamiliar.

You don't know Jack Shit.

Perhaps not, but I'm actually on rather good terms with his wealthier cousin Theodore.

by Pipe Downn January 21, 2009

Jack Shit

nothing,ziltch,zero,empty,contains absolutely nothing.

Asked if he had won any money on lotto, sam replied,"nah got jack shit" There was jack shit left in the fridge.

by timothy mark kluwen April 22, 2007