Functionally Hot

Being attractive by virtue of how one uses their body, usually physically. Not to be confused with being attractive because of one's build.

Josh: To be honest, Alina Zagitova isn't really my type.
Jerry: Sure, but you should see her skate. She's functionally hot!

by DMTeen November 25, 2020

Functionally Fucked

Drunk as a motherfucker but with an odd sense of clarity and functionality.

Person 1: "How is Ben taking a test right now, he's had 18 drinks??"
Person 2: "I guess he's just functionally fucked."

by Ttirrem ikslahcim November 28, 2021

functionally insane

A completely unreasonable person who constantly reacts with anger or any other extreme emotion when they do not get their way often over simple things "normal" individuals take in stride, but not insane enough to be placed in a home (due to frequency of occurences) but still causes enough misery and grief for themselves and others around them.

Melissa made us all uncomfortable when she kicked the walls and struck herself repeatedly when she learned a check she wrote bounced at the bank. A simple error drove her into a rage and we all believe she is functionally insane.

by Foxy Funderburke September 20, 2009

functionally Amish

The condition of being clueless about technology.

She can't figure out how to open her e-mail; she's functionally Amish.

by xxoomom February 8, 2010

Functionally lazy

Someone who is not actually lazy, but someone who never empties the bin, never refills the toilet roll , never buys the milk, never cleans the van, never does day to day functional tasks

That sales guy in the office gets great sales figures, but there is no tea bags again, he is so functionally lazy

by Col Decker November 16, 2021

Functionally Bent

One who uses recreational (mostly non-addictive) drugs daily while maintaining an otherwise normal life.

During the 1970's, most teenagers lived a functionally bent life while doing drugs every day and attending school under the influence of those substances.

by Corvette4meus August 12, 2009

functionally lazy

A person who is good at their job, and not actually lazy - but is someone who never replaces the toilet paper, never buys the milk, never empties the bins, never buys the doughnuts, never sweeps up, never refills the coffee, thus is functionally lazy

Look at Todd, his sales figures are awesome, but there is no coffee - he is so functionally lazy

by Col Decker November 17, 2021