The sublime masturbation practice (Fjordglimping) involves poking a precisely 5 cm needle inside the tip of the penis, down to the root, then pulling the needle up and out of the penis. That process shall be repeated until climax.
This climax, if done correctly and performed for 66 hours, will transform and ascend your soul to the outer fraction of the galaxy.
This practice is described by many people (including myself) as ethereal, throbbingly transcendental, and gulpingly overwhelming.
Top critic, Matt Damon, who has perfected the practice masterfully, says that Fjordglimping is a "hand-crafted paradise."
other critics who also have perfected the practice:
1. The Rizzler
2. Lucas Ransborg
3. the creature
4. John pork (Rest in Peace)
5. Queen Elizabeth II (before her passing)
This climax, if done correctly and performed for 66 hours, will transform and ascend your soul to the outer fraction of the galaxy.
This practice is described by many people (including myself) as ethereal, throbbingly transcendental, and gulpingly overwhelming.
Top critic, Matt Damon, who has perfected the practice masterfully, says that Fjordglimping is a "hand-crafted paradise."
other critics who also have perfected the practice:
1. The Rizzler
2. Lucas Ransborg
3. the creature
4. John pork (Rest in Peace)
5. Queen Elizabeth II (before her passing)
by ZenzeiGoon December 22, 2024
Get the Fjordglimping mug.The act of cutting ones shaft of, then inserting a finger in the hole for maximum satisfaction, then you stitch a veru rare organic dildó and you Waits about a week and then doing it again. This practice was created in the northern part of Iceland and is mostly practiced there.
by pjalli123 June 14, 2025
Get the Fjordglimping mug.Partaking in sexual acts with furries in a dark forrest surrounded by worshippers of the swedish spirit of goon
"Hey man, lets Fjordglimp." "Nah my butt still hurts from last night's Fjordglimping, those furries got me good."
by Fjordexpert99_glimper January 21, 2025
Get the Fjordglimping mug.The highest reality attainable in the Gooning multiverse. Cosmic-level gooning. Gooning in the 5th dimension. A state of goon so pure that god sheds a tear.
“Jelq. Edge. Goon. These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect Gooner. But Doctor Proctor the Prostate Doctor accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction—access to the r/feet subreddit. Thus, the Fjordglimper was born. Using their ultra-super powers, the Fjordglimper has dedicated their life to fjordglimping, or gooning on such a level that our feeble human minds would shatter under its weight.”
by Balls ™ April 11, 2025
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