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Couldn't train a choko vine to grow up a dunny wall

Australian descriptive metaphor.

The person in question is of such incompetence or stupidity they indeed couldn't train a choko vine to grow up a dunny wall. Commonly used to refer to a dim workmate or acquaintance.

The choko (also known as a cheyote or chouchou, among others) being an extremely hardy vine fruit that, left to its own devices, will grow up virtually any surface.
The paperwork's wrong again! Honestly, that moron couldn't train a choko vine to grow up a dunny wall!
by TrajeAUS_ January 16, 2011
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dunny

"I need to go to the dunny."
"I jus' dropped a fat shit in the dunny."
by Diego September 9, 2003
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dunny

Slang for "friend" or "homie"
What up dunny?

How's it goin' dunny?
by Pi-John September 30, 2005
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Dunny Budgies

Dunny budgies probably originated in Australia. Another name for blowflies. Also known as "dunny bees." The Australian budgerigar is a common bird, found virtually everywhere in the country and widely kept as a pet
"Get the fly spray out, Dave, some dunny budgies just followed you inside the house."
by Peter Bird December 16, 2007
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dunny paper

a) Toilet paper
b) An undeveloped photo of a gook
a) Aww, I just took a mad shit. Now I need to wipe my arse with dunny paper.

b) Dunny paper is an undeveloped photo of a gook. Once I wipe my arse it will be properly developed
by powza the arouser June 7, 2007
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dunny

Where's the dunny located?
by Edward H. Zumstein June 9, 2005
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Dunnycake

Solid lump of stinky toilet jelly. Made by adding jelly crystals to the toilet water after you taking a dump. Needs time to set before achieving unflushable status.
Dude, that fucker left a dunnycake in my parent's toilet, I'm going to have to break it up before I can flush it.
by Terry tough cunt August 22, 2011
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