Consuela

The best character in Family Guy. A Hispanic maid who appears in several episodes.

Consuela: "Oh, no, doggie out! Afuera!"

Stewie: "This isn't Windex, but it's the store brand; it's just as good."
Consuela: "No, no... it leave a film."
Stewie: "I don't care about the film, just use it!"
Consuela: "No, no... I no can clean."
Stewie: "Ssshhhhhhhit."

by seastone130 March 17, 2010

Italian consulate

A place where you go if you are desperate to lose time. A place where you go for experiencing red tape in its supreme form. A place where you go if you want to experience administration as it was handled in the 17th century or earlier.

I have too much time today, I guess I'll go to the Italian consulate on Park Avenue.

by groovymanu May 14, 2015

chainsaw consultant

Independent contractors brought in by upper management under the auspices of "streamlining work flow", but in actuality to suggest what positions can be eliminated thus reducing headcount and overhead for purposes of downsizing.

In the movie "Office Space" the characters referred to as "The Bobs" are classic examples of chainsaw consultants. The main character avoids being fired through a combination of unexpected brutal honesty about his lack of passion for his position, and also engendering camaraderie with those sent to determine if his
job is really necessary.

by Cale Dempster December 18, 2008

consultant

Someone who borrows your watch to tell you the time, and then walks off with it

a consultant is a legitimate, occasionally usefull professional adivser

by 666Mike999 August 17, 2006

Consuela

Universal name for a hotel maid.

"We need more towels. Call Consuela!"

by GreenMonter August 8, 2005

Network Consultant

A parasite that contributes nothing to the network and is only looking for ways to stay on the payroll. This is the individual at the burger joint that asks “do you want fries with that?” The network Consultant is constantly looking for useless network tweaks to justify his presence at a customer site. Be especially weary of the Euro-trash no talent hack type; this character dazzles senior management with a ridiculous accent all the while unraveling the solid network that’s in place. Network consultants never look at a network as a whole, but only analyze bits and pieces of it. In this manner they always have work do to since the last project they completed broke some other part of the network.

I’m gonna have to give nickel blow jobs in the street to get my self respect back after taking this network consultant job.

If that network consultant was on fire; I wouldn’t piss on him.

by network dog February 14, 2006

Consuela

No,No. We need more Lemon Pledge.....

Announcer: Is Mister John home?
Consuela: No, No. Mister John no home.

by TheAwokenMyth April 11, 2017