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Two Can Van Damme

Alt: Two Can Jackie Chan

A rather embarrassing (for friends present who are sober / can handle their drink) and woeful condition in which the sufferer changes from a passive to an aggressive personality type having consumed a couple of pints of piss weak lager. The afflicted light weight can be regularly observed in bars and clubs, squaring up to people who are considerably taller, stronger and more adept at martial arts than they are. These 'confrontations' inevitably lead to the 'Two Can' Action Man receiving a swift kicking, necessitating an equally predictable detour to a casualty department. Also seen on execrable Police based TV documentaries adopting unconvincing martial arts poses, a la Karate Kid, in front of bored Police Officers. Just who are you trying to fool? The Police will tazer and break you!!!
Mate 1: Jim's been to hospital again!
Mate 2: Yeah the twat! He was round at mine and had two cans of Stella. Next thing you know he tried to chop a brick in half with his hand.
Mate 1: Not as bad as the time he spent two weeks in traction after he had two glasses of cider, decided he was hard and nutted that bouncer in the chest....What a Two Can Van Damme.
by TheFoolOnTheHillAnarchy October 20, 2012
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jean claude van damme

star of many amazing films such as bloodsport and kick boxer.
wow! theres jean claude van damme, doing roundhouses
by the badger July 25, 2003
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kickin' like Van Damme

When a chick is so hot in booty-shorts, you want to watch her spread her legs between two driving big rigs.
Damn! Paula is kickin' like Van Damme right now! I wanna get up in them guts.
by Bigg Tiggs March 21, 2017
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Van Damme facial.

Much like the traditional act of a man giving a woman a faceful of cum, but characterised by a vigorous display of effort and release. In doing so, the man has an expression and makes a sound much like Jean Claude Van Damme in those slow motion close ups of his face when he performs his big finale kick on the 'bad guy'.

Especially appropriate when copulating with a lady of loose morals and an a voracious appetite for all manner of sexual endeavour (AKA "a good girl").
Look at the arse on that one over there... I'd love to give her a Van Damme Facial.

Deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
by Antony December 20, 2003
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VAN DAMME

The act of kicking open a door very loudly. You usually yell the words VAN DAMME as you are doing it as well. Refers to the action movie star Jean Claude Van Damme, and how his kicks can bust down doors.

This is helpful when you want to be an obnoxious asshole, or you're carrying something and can't use your hands.
Ahhh shit I can't open that door with all this shit in my hands. Oh well, VAN DAMME!(Busts open door with kick)
by BigYetiDick January 28, 2008
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Van-Damme it

1.To push aside personal feelings or obstacles and focus on the task at hand.

2.To, somehow, be able to land a full-splits spinning roundhouse kick to the face of a superior opponenet whilst blinded by salt thrown by said oponent.
You:"Dude, I can't go to work. I feel like crap after Cindy dumped me."

Me:"You gotta Van-Damme it and go anyway. Frank Dux didn't want to go to the Kumite but he did it AND he won."
by Yehudi c/o Rhett April 29, 2008
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Jean-Claude Van Damme

The definition of ass-kicking
That guy kicks so much ass, you'd think he was Jean-Claude Van Damme
by Rossman! May 6, 2006
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