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The Toilet Ruler 

A method used to measure a person's penis size. It is measured by where the skitmark is left on the toilet bowl.
In the front indicates a small penis size, in the middle indicates a medium penis size or good sanitation after using the toilet, and on the back indicates a big penis size.

This method works for mosts toilets, and is considered solid proof.
Jon: "Hey! Bob just got finished taking a shit! He always brags about his big cock, let's check it out once and for all by using the toilet ruler"

Kyle: "MAN! Bob really does have a huge dick! The skitmark is at the very back of the toilet bowl!"
The Toilet Ruler by chillsaster November 21, 2010

The Toilet Bowl 

The illustrious honor given to a NCAA football team that misses bowl season.
Congratulations 5-7 UT, you just earned a bid to the Toilet Bowl!
The Toilet Bowl by Gorilla Adam December 4, 2010

The Toilet Plunger

Sex act for those into coprophilia, brown showers or scat play in general. A male defecates/shits into their partners mouth, then while that person holds the still hot shit in their open mouth, the shitter turns around and face-fucks them - pushing the shit both out of their mouth and onto their face and also down their throat. The cock is the plunger for the toilet mouth.
Chris was amazed that Sarah didn’t gag as he did The Toilet Plunger on her shit-filled mouth.
The Toilet Plunger by Eatplayrun December 3, 2019

The toilet paper shortage of 2020 

The Corona virus has apparently caused everyone to shit themselves and thus but 9000 rolls of toilet paper.
Our children will not believe this.
The toilet paper shortage of 2020 has really messed up my time in quarantine.

the toilet bowl 

not only tis it a place of sacrafice, it tis a place of round swirly things and teddy bears. (And god knows tis the only place you can get some PRIVACY) except for at Jenna's House.
jenna yelling: GET OUT OF HERE, CANT YOU SEE IM IN MY PLACE OF WORSHIP?!!

dont abuse the powers of the sacred toilet bowl

The Toilet Cleaners Paradox

If you are the best at cleaning toilets, you will never be promoted to taking out the trash. Incompetent people can rise while those that do the dirty but critical work will remain stuck.... cleaning the toilets.
It appears i suffer from the toilet cleaners paradox as I can't progress in my career while others more forward.