The Ten Commuffments
And the Muff spoke all these words, saying: "I am Muff!"
ONE: You shall have no other Muffs before Me.
TWO: You shall not make yourself a carved Muff--any likeness of anything that is in Muff heaven above, or that is in the Muff beneath, or that is in the Muff under the Earth.
THREE: You shall not take the name of the Muff in Vain.
FOUR: Remember the Muff day, to keep it Muffy.
FIVE: Honor your Muff's.
SIX: You shall not murder Muff.
SEVEN: You shall not commit adultery on Muff.
EIGHT: You shall not steal Muff.
NINE: You shall not bear false witness against your Muff.
TEN: You shall not covet your Muff's house; you shall not covet your Muff, nor the Muff's partner, nor the Muff servant, nor his Muffiest of Muffs, nor his Muffets, nor his Muffins, nor his Muffings, nor his Muffed Muff, nor his Muff Muffs, nor his Muffism ways, nor his Muff Monster, nor his Muff cheese, nor his Muffdoctor, nor his Muffdiver, nor anything that is your Muff's.
And the Muff spoke all these words, saying: "I am Muff!"
ONE: You shall have no other Muffs before Me.
TWO: You shall not make yourself a carved Muff--any likeness of anything that is in Muff heaven above, or that is in the Muff beneath, or that is in the Muff under the Earth.
THREE: You shall not take the name of the Muff in Vain.
FOUR: Remember the Muff day, to keep it Muffy.
FIVE: Honor your Muff's.
SIX: You shall not murder Muff.
SEVEN: You shall not commit adultery on Muff.
EIGHT: You shall not steal Muff.
NINE: You shall not bear false witness against your Muff.
TEN: You shall not covet your Muff's house; you shall not covet your Muff, nor the Muff's partner, nor the Muff servant, nor his Muffiest of Muffs, nor his Muffets, nor his Muffins, nor his Muffings, nor his Muffed Muff, nor his Muff Muffs, nor his Muffism ways, nor his Muff Monster, nor his Muff cheese, nor his Muffdoctor, nor his Muffdiver, nor anything that is your Muff's.
Muff: Live life by the code of Muffism.
Joe Jerk Off: How do I do that?
Muff: Start by reading The Ten Commuffments...
Joe Jerk Off: How do I do that?
Muff: Start by reading The Ten Commuffments...
by Muffism June 2, 2010
Get the The Ten Commuffments mug.The first ten secends after you take a shot and you don't know if you are going to throw up or you are going to have a great night!
Originates from the danish term 'de ti døds sekunder'
Originates from the danish term 'de ti døds sekunder'
by Shot overdose July 29, 2019
Get the The ten seconds of death mug.1. be gay do crime
2. sweater weather
3. they look so pretty it hurts
4. dreamnotfound
5. yeah i’ve met jared (of course i’ve met jared!)
6. 66
6. clear phone case
6. cuffed jeans
9. elsa
10. cottage in the woods
2. sweater weather
3. they look so pretty it hurts
4. dreamnotfound
5. yeah i’ve met jared (of course i’ve met jared!)
6. 66
6. clear phone case
6. cuffed jeans
9. elsa
10. cottage in the woods
by anonymous February 5, 2021
Get the The Ten Commandments mug.Number one: The challenge, demand satisfaction. If they apologize, no need for further action.
Number two:
If they don't, grab a friend, that's your second. Your Lieutenant, when there's reckoning to be reckoned.
Number three:
Have your seconds meet face to face, Negotiate a peace or negotiate a time and place. This is commonplace, specially 'tween recruits.Most disputes die and no one shoots.
Number four:
If they don't reach a peace, that's alright
Time to get some pistols and a doctor on site. You pay him in advance, you treat him with civility. You have him turn around, so he can have deniability
Five:
Duel before the sun is in the sky,
Pick a place to die where it's high and dry.
Number six:
Leave a note for your next of kin. Tell 'em where you been, pray that Hell or Heaven lets you in.
Seven:
Confess your sins ready for the moment of adrenaline when you finally face your opponent.
Number eight:
Your last chance to negotiate
Send in your seconds see if they can set the record straight.
Number nine:
Look him in the eye, aim no higher.
Summon all the courage you require.
Then count, One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine number (Ten paces!) Fire!
Number two:
If they don't, grab a friend, that's your second. Your Lieutenant, when there's reckoning to be reckoned.
Number three:
Have your seconds meet face to face, Negotiate a peace or negotiate a time and place. This is commonplace, specially 'tween recruits.Most disputes die and no one shoots.
Number four:
If they don't reach a peace, that's alright
Time to get some pistols and a doctor on site. You pay him in advance, you treat him with civility. You have him turn around, so he can have deniability
Five:
Duel before the sun is in the sky,
Pick a place to die where it's high and dry.
Number six:
Leave a note for your next of kin. Tell 'em where you been, pray that Hell or Heaven lets you in.
Seven:
Confess your sins ready for the moment of adrenaline when you finally face your opponent.
Number eight:
Your last chance to negotiate
Send in your seconds see if they can set the record straight.
Number nine:
Look him in the eye, aim no higher.
Summon all the courage you require.
Then count, One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine number (Ten paces!) Fire!
by XxWhorexX November 16, 2024
Get the The Ten Duel Commandments mug.by The Time Lion October 18, 2016
Get the On the ten mug."I'm never eating ten Burrito Supremes all at once again. No more huffing the ten-pound brow!!"
"I totally filled up the shitter huffing the ten-pound brow."
"I nearly had to give myself the double fish hook while huffing the ten-pound brow!!."
"I totally filled up the shitter huffing the ten-pound brow."
"I nearly had to give myself the double fish hook while huffing the ten-pound brow!!."
by Billy Beck O'Hannity April 3, 2010
Get the huffing the ten-pound brow mug.by Woody Thomas July 28, 2008
Get the broke as the ten commandments mug.