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mallardy

An affliction which causes a woman to make a duckface when posing for a photo.
"What is Stacy doing with her lips in all her pics? She looks like a fucking duck!"
"She has a mallardy. Unfortunately incurable."
by poppingivy May 20, 2014
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mallard

An old east coast term for a hundred dollar bill used mainly by the lumpenproletariat .
Pete: I just lost 6 mallards in that juicy poker game down the street.
Phil: You fool. I told you to play here in my game. We give you an honest gamble here.

money buck sawbuck benjamin fin jackson yard dollar
by vastydeep March 15, 2016
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Mall-Tard

An angst-ridden, unhappy child, anywhere from the age of 13-19, who's only dream that he/she hasn't given up on is to venture to the mall whenever he/she is not in school (and as long as mommy's giving him/her a ride) and collaborate with other Mall-Tards like him/herself.

80% of Mall-Tards specifically are overweight, 15 year-old scene girls, who tend to insult any unsuspecting passerby under their breath, without mercy or remorse. Beware the Mall-Tard when in groups. Very much like the nimble wolf, they have power in numbers. Groups of Mall-Tards may even muster up enough backbone to say something unkind to you within the range of decibels that the human ear can pick up!

Not unlike the wolf, the Mall-Tard is rarely seen outside of its pack- although they have been known to split from their main company into smaller platoons in order to cover more area. This can be useful when said Mall-Tards want to have their presence known in the food court, but can't sacrifice the search for the extra-small Bullet for My Valentine shirts in Hot Topic.

Mall-Tards have a never-ending hatred for all that walks on two legs- and beyond. Many theorize that this hatred is manifested from the smoldering remains of their haunted and traumatic pasts, but many experts in the field also argue that they are only pussies and ass-eaters with no knowledge of the world or its people, and have plenty of their parents money to blow.
EX:1
Dude 1: Dude, let's just go into Teavana- I can see a gaggle of Mall-Tards coming straight for us!
Dude 2: But they always try to sell you shit in there...
Dude 1: THERE'S NO FUCKING TIME LET'S GO!!!

EX:2

Mall-Tard girl: Hey!! You want my phone number sexxxy?!!
Dude: No- what are you like 10?
Mall-Tard Girl: FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING FAGGOT ASS CUNTLICKING RETARDFAG I HOPE YOUR BOYFRIEND DIES!!!1!
Dude's friend: Dude you just got Mall-Tarded!

EX:3

Mall-Tard 1: I hate waiting outside of Vitamin World! I wanna die! Look at all of these fags trying to buy their faggot ass fag pills.

Man walking into Vitamin World: *Stops and stares*
(Mall-Tard 1 Immediately turns around and hides amongst his fellow Mall-Tards; Man walks away)
Mall-Tard 2: Don't worry, that guy was a fag
by dojo24 November 20, 2010
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mallard

A term given to gamers who die a lot in battle. Such as a mallard flying by just waiting to be shot. Someone who runs out in the open and is shot immediately.
Specifically in Halo 3 if the person dies 13 times in a 4 on 4 battle up to a 50, they are a mallard. 17 or more and you are an Uber-Mallard. It is usually required that you profess your malardry to the other teammates.

Eg., Teammate: "14 deaths are you kidding me? Say it." Mallard: "I'm a mallard.." Teammate: "Yes you are"
by The Smoke Monster February 5, 2010
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Mallard Olympics

A series of physical competitions between ducks.
YO BRO DID YOU SEE THE MALLARD OLYMPICS LAST NIGHT?
by frankson1234 January 29, 2012
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Mallard Lips

To have the lips resemebling the bill of a Canadian Mallard duck (Anas platyrhynchos)
by alvin maker January 31, 2007
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The Mallard Duck

A sex move where the male is normally in the missionary position. Before completion, the male will stick a piece of lit dynamite into the woman's vaginal area, and time his load perfectly in reference to the fuse of the dynamite. This will result in the explosion of his male reproductive system into the woman's vagina, hence the term "Mallard Duck."
"Baby, I want to try The Mallard Duck tonight."
by ekgi November 10, 2018
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