Jonesed

when one has a task to do, or has an opportunity of some sort, but instead does nothing for no apparent reason, until it is too late. Normally due to the lack of drugs, or as a result of using crappy drugs.

1. I was supposed to go for that job interview today, but I fuckin jonesed on pornhub all day.

2. "Dude! you said you were gonna be there! what happened?" I don't know, after that joint I just jonesed for a while and went to sleep.

3. Fuck. I'm so jonesed. You got any?

by googalewski August 26, 2019

Jonesed

Getting drunk and expressing your feelings to a girl you are interested in. This comes in the form of a long text or multiple phone calls and usually results in rejection and regret.

I went out last night and totally jonesed Lauren bro. no shot she gets with me now.

by Lalallala March 14, 2025

Jonesed

Getting drunk and expressing your feelings to a girl you are interested in. This comes in the form of a long text or multiple phone calls and usually results in rejection and regret.

I went out last night and totally jonesed Lauren bro. no shot she gets with me now.

by Lalallala March 14, 2025

jonesed up

pumped up, excited and wanting to do something. Example: On the TV series "Fast & Loud" he was about to buy an old lifted van & he asked Aaron what he thought and then he said "You're all jones up, you're gonna sleep in this thing tonight".

I'm all jonesed up to go racing.

by Jonesed Up September 25, 2013

Phil Jonesed

someone is Phil Jonesed when a girl/guy makes them strip with the intention to have sex but then changes his/her mind and not have sex with them, resulting in them putting their clothes back on in failure and shame.

a reference to Manchester United player Phil Jones who took his shirt off in celebration before Sergio Aguero's late league winning goal during the 2011/2012 BPL season

john: did you get lucky with Sasha?

tom: no she came over, we made out then she stopped and left after i got naked

john: you got Phil Jonesed

by ThatDude1988 July 12, 2012

Mr Jonesed

To be caught with child pornography, or to be caught having been involved in sexual acts with someone under theage of consent. Can also be used as a derogetary term to imply someone is a paedophile when in fact they aren't

"Did you hear that old man down the street was Mr Jonesed? knew something was up with him..."

by Uzumaki Mitch June 17, 2006

get Alex Jonesed

When someone loses access to their accounts on multiple online services, as punishment for violating no rules on one of the services, as though by conspiracy.

"Mister Metokur's Facebook page is down?"
"Yeah, after he got his second YouTube strike, they counted it as three strikes, and then he started to get Alex Jonesed."

by DiscoKrakken August 28, 2018