An add to travel back in time pasted together with a school picture of a guy with strange hair called Captian J picard. The add reads: "WANTED: Somebody to go back in time with me. This is not a joke. P.O. Box ____, Oakview, CA 93022. You'll get paid when we get back. Must bring your own weapons. Saftey not guaranteed I have only done this once before."
"WANTED: Somebody to go back in time with me. This is not a joke. P.O. Box ____, Oakview, CA 93022. You'll get paid when we get back. Must bring your own weapons. Saftey not guaranteed I have only done this once before."
by saftey not guaranteed August 15, 2006
Get the Saftey Not Guaranteed mug.The act of guaranteeing something, and I the outcome is not what is guaranteed then the person must shit their pants.
Tom B: I guarenshee that we will beat the Eagles in the Super Bowl.
(5 hours later Tom B was forced to shit his own pants)
(5 hours later Tom B was forced to shit his own pants)
by Dwight Danger Schrute December 3, 2018
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A person (usually a man) who succeeds in busting a nut, 100% of the time when he engages in sexual activity. This is a term of high regard, and connotes that one has the sexual prowess to effectively release their load 100% of the time during sexual relations. Also known by the acronym GC'er.
Hey Kristen, I'd love for you to meet my friend, he's a great guy, a real mensch. Like all of the stallions who I call my wingmen, he is a Guaranteed Cummer.
What do you mean a Guaranteed Cummer?
Oh, he cums every time, 100% of the time!
What do you mean a Guaranteed Cummer?
Oh, he cums every time, 100% of the time!
by El Don Parchador January 4, 2011
Get the Guaranteed Cummer mug.by Rowan11111 October 28, 2007
Get the guaranteed mug.When you creep your way into an intersection with the intention to turn left, yet there is no end to oncoming traffic in sight.
This way, when the light eventually turns red, you are guaranteed the quick left turn in the short delay between oncoming traffic stopping and the crossing traffic going.
This way, when the light eventually turns red, you are guaranteed the quick left turn in the short delay between oncoming traffic stopping and the crossing traffic going.
"Traffic was really heavy and the green arrow had already disappeared, so rather than wait through a whole new light cycle, I made the guaranteed left."
by Pilotguy44 October 6, 2009
Get the Guaranteed Left mug.The poor girlfriend in a falty relationship who is actually a more involved booty call rather than a true girlfriend. The guy gets involved in the relationship so that when he is with her he has a more guarenteed chance to have sex. He will shower her with gifts, sweet talk her on the phone, and celebrate random anniversaries. This is also the boyfriend who will not put his relationship on a social networking site and makes up some excuse when his real reason is he could tell a random girl that he doesn't have a girlfriend. This is most common in college. As mentioned before he feels that this is perfect for the random breaks, he knows that he will have sex when he is home.
Jill is just some guaranteed ass, I take her out for her birthday, get her some flowers than I get sex whenever I want.
by Amy H January 6, 2008
Get the Guaranteed Ass mug.by Laila Andrews April 13, 2020
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